Tag: Jesus

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Community Matters

The deep longings we have to know and be known by true friends, comes from God. We were created for community. Small groups is where we experience Bible Study, Community, and Care. Jesus is the bread of life, but it is His community that serves it to us.

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It was the Sunday before Thanksgiving in 2010. I had been without a job for almost a year. It had been a hard year and probably the worst of it wasn’t financial but the toll that it took on my own sense of worth. I had been beaten down and struggled every day to recognize that Jesus was all that I really needed. I focused on Him and had some truly incredible moments, but I also had some of my darkest moments during that time. Anyway, that Sunday night we were home doing nothing, I mean, we didn’t have much to do. We had cancelled internet and couldn’t afford anything really. But there was a knock at the door, so I went and answered it. Outside the door was a crowd of people singing Christmas carols, but they weren’t just carolers. They were our friends. Friends from other cities and other states. Friends from next door. Friends from our church, our small group, and from churches we served years before, old students from my youth ministry days. These were not just people. They were “our people.” Miranda and I stood with our kids in our arms and tears in our eyes. As they finished singing, one of them said, “Steve, Miranda, we know you’ve had a difficult year, but wanted you to know that you aren’t alone. We’re here for you. One of them gave Miranda a brown paper bag and then they all took turns greeting us individually sharing their lives and hearts with us as they dropped money and checks into the bag. We got to experience this little community of God’s people “being the church” for us that night. It was humbling, but amazing! Later that night one of my friends reminded me, “Steve, we could have sent you the money. This wasn’t about the money. We knew you needed more than that. We wanted to be with you guys. We wanted you to know we were hurting for you and we may have been miles away, but we have been going through this with you. We’re here for you.” He was right.

Guys, in all honesty, I don’t know where I’d be today if I had continued down the path I was traveling. They were dark times for sure, but we weren’t alone. Even when it felt like it. Jesus saw us, His people. He knew the condition of my heart and heard the desperation in my prayers. He knew my heart ‘cause He created it. We thought we were alone, but “our people,” “Jesus’ people,” a community of Christ followers – They were with us. Praying for us, Lovingly pulling for us, scheming and secretly planning to show up for us. We were never alone because Jesus was working to stir His people on our behalf. He had a plan to use His people, the church.

You see, we were made for community. We like to think that we are independent and strong and that we don’t need anything or anyone. Our culture especially tells men that this is what it is to be a man – to be tough and rugged and strongly independent. Our culture celebrates radical individualism and the self-made person. But our culture is wrong. There’s a dark side to this kind of individualism. It’s called loneliness, and the US Surgeon General called it a “social epidemic.” This radical individualism and device empowered isolation are both contributing to our mental health crisis. There’s really no getting around it. We need each other.

We are created for community. From the core of who we are, we long for it. When God created the world and everything we know, He would create something and then proclaim that it was “good.” Light, good. Land, good. Plants, good, Heavens, good. Animals, good. He proclaims everything good – until He creates man. With Adam, God says for the first time, “It is not good.” It’s not good for man to be alone. That’s when He created Eve.  God created us to be in community. I mean, really God Himself is a community. The Tri-une God, 3-in-1. The Father, Son, and Holy Spirit are their own community. And we were created “in His image.” We long for community ‘cause He created us that way.

God’s design for His people to be in community can be traced all throughout the Bible, all the way to Jesus. He spent most of His time with a community Himself, a small group. It’s 12 guys.

Real community is found in Jesus ‘cause He alone can offer the forgiveness that is needed for us to have real connections and offer real grace to real people.  

Think about your own life. It’s crazy how much we long for someone to truly “see” us. From the time we were just children, we’d yell from the playground. “Mom! Look at me!” And it has just continued into adulthood. We want to be known, and to be loved just as we are. We want people to love us in spite of our shortcomings. People who will accept us like we are, but also want more for us. People who see our potential and believe in us. People who will lead us to grow and be challenged and improve.

We want all of this, but we’re also deeply afraid of it. We think that if people really know us, there is no way that they’d love us. We think we’ve got to keep certain parts of our lives hidden away and out of sight. However, we’ve got to learn to be bravely vulnerable. The Brazos Pointe core value is: Authentic Living over Maintaining Appearances. I know it can be intimidating because our deepest wounds come from relationships, but we’ve got to remember that so do our greatest joys and deepest healing. They come on the other side of our vulnerability.   

So. . . here we are. We’re made for community. We know we need it and we even long for it, but what do we do?

Many seek community in other activities – sports teams, clubs, social media, political organizations. Really anywhere people gather represents some way that people are seeking connections. Unfortunately, these all fall short. None of them can offer the forgiveness that we have in Jesus and that’s the only way we can have true relationships. God has designed us for much more than any of these other activities can offer and He has given us the church, His people, to satisfy that longing.

So what does a community of Christ followers look like?

Turn with me to Acts 2:42-47. (5th book of the NT – just after the Gospels – Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, Acts.) Now to be clear, Randy shared a message on these verses about a year ago as a part of the Acts series we’ve been working through, but it’s just too good not to return to it today. These verses describe how Christ followers interacted with each other in their community just after His ascension – when He left the earth. It also describes what our community should look like.  As the Discipleship Minister here, this describes my dream, my vision for small groups where we can all truly experience the church, and learn to be the church for one another. It’s a place that calls us to grow and become, but also to know and be known. Sunday mornings just aren’t as effective at that. If you come to worship every Sunday, but are still disconnected, then you’re missing something. If you think you’re too busy, I’m sorry but you’re wrong. I get it. I’ve been there and I’ve made those mistakes. (I even stood in front of you guys and shared about it a few weeks ago.) But speaking from experience, there is a price to pay. If you’re too busy, then you’d be better off letting go of something else than missing out on what Jesus has for us in community. Small groups create a perfect place to truly experience God’s people and to practice our faith, building spiritual muscles, reflexes, and habits.

Look with me:

Acts 2

42They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. 43Everyone was filled with awe at the many wonders and signs performed by the apostles. 44All the believers were together and had everything in common. 45They sold property and possessions to give to anyone who had need. 46Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, 47praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved.

Now let me point out a few things here.

First of all, notice verse 44. It says, “All the believers were together.” and had everything in common. It doesn’t say they “met” together or that they “came” together. It says they “were” together. I think this is talking about physical proximity, but I think it’s more than that. It describes a “togetherness” that goes beyond location and speaks of their hearts. They were working out their faith together. They were likeminded and found ways to be in agreement – unified by Jesus. They had been apart, but now in Jesus, they have become “together.” I mean, we can be “with” someone and not be “with” them, right?!?! I can be with someone physically, but not with them emotionally or intellectually. Man, I’m not even always “with” Miranda, my wife when we talk about it this way. She loves Gilmore Girls. I’m definitely not “with” her. She doesn’t like Seinfeld so she’s not “with” me either. We don’t share that bond, but we do have a deeper bond in Jesus.

I actually believe this statement about the first Christ followers is one of God’s most amazing miracles! These people were from vastly different walks of life. They had opposing views on lots of issues, but they were still “with” each other. Can you imagine a group of democrats and republicans who are “with” each other? “Jesus over everything.” Right?!?! In Jesus, it is possible. We can find unity. Though we were apart, we can be “with” one another. As a matter of fact, if we are with Christ, abiding in Him, we are already “with” one another. This is community. This kind of “withness” is our goal here at BPF, and our vehicle for getting there is small groups.      

Now, Brazos Pointe emphasizes three primary activities in our groups. Bible Study, Community, and Care. We can see all of these in this passage. Let’s consider the 1st of these activities: Bible Study.

Now, Vs 42 says they were “devoted to the apostles’ teaching.” These teachings have become what we know now as the Bible today. In their time together, the Bible was central. It guided their lives. Their “withness” was found as they gathered around God’s Word, and they worked to both understand and obey it together. They didn’t just show up and learn and then walk away feeling proud of what they knew. No! They were dedicated to working it out and to living it out.

James 1:22 says “Do not merely listen to the word and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says.”

If you look closely at the Acts passage, it’s clear that they set up daily habits. It says they “continued” to do these things and it actually uses the word “daily.” They were practicing rhythms intentionally so they could live as they understood Jesus’ call on their lives. They knew that knowledge alone wouldn’t shape and form them, but small, obedient decisions repeated over and over were the key. It would take practice, effort, work, and intentionality. We’ve got to make conscious, calculated, and deliberate decisions about our own spiritual growth and our communities, or we will end up aged infants just big just babies.

The 2nd primary activity in a BPF small group is Community. Vs 42 says they were devoted “to fellowship.” Being together. Enjoying one another. They were committed to each other everywhere they went too. We see them together in public spaces like the temple studying the Bible, but it also says in vs 46, that it continued when they went home. It says they did this every day. Man, these guys couldn’t get enough of each other. And they couldn’t get enough of the Bible either. It was an obsession. Jesus compelled them to one another. Community, life together, “withness” was a habit and a rhythm that was growing in their lives, and the longer they practiced it, the deeper those roots became. Their community preferred the craziness of a crowded life with Jesus’ people over the solitary life of independent living. They made a good choice.

US Surgeon General said that isolation is worse for your health than 15 cigarettes/day.

Christian author, John Ortberg summed up a 7000 person study saying, “Researchers found that the most isolated people were 3 times more likely to die than those with strong relational connections. People who had bad health habits such as smoking, poor eating habits, or obesity or alcohol use, but strong social ties, lived significantly longer than people that had great health habits, but were isolated.”

Andy Stanley piggybacked on this saying, “It is better to eat Twinkies with good friends than to eat broccoli alone.”

In addition to the Bible, history, science, and sociology all point to our need for community and the dangers of isolation. We were made for community.

The last of our 3 primary small group activities is Care. Vs 45 says they sold their possessions to care for “anyone who had need.”  I think that means they made sacrifices to care for the annoying people, and the ones who always seemed to need a little extra grace. It means people who are democrats and people who are republicans. It means people who are rich & poor, sick or healthy. It even means people that we don’t like. , . or people who are simply not like us. They took care of everyone.

Galatians 6:2 – “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.”

I love this verse. We can fulfill the law of Christ (that’s love) by helping others. “Fulfill” is a big word. And the “law of Christ” is a monumental task, but in one simple act, we can get ‘er done.

Now, I’ve been in churches for most of my life and when we hear about people going through struggles, we like to say, “I’ll pray for you.” We like saying that ‘cause it makes us feel better and sounds all spiritual, but how often do we actually pray? Sometimes what people really need is someone to come over with a truck and help them move their couch. Prayer is important and good, but a kind word, a shoulder to cry on, your presence at a hospital, a smiling face behind a coffee cup. . . man, sometimes these are the things that make the biggest difference. It’s been almost 15 years, and I’m still talking about people showing up in my front yard. By the way, these are the kinds of things that become simple and come naturally when we have the right kinds of relationships with people – when we have taken the time to truly invest in people and work over time to build a history with them. You’d probably stand in someone’s yard like that if you were close to them. You wouldn’t skip a hospital visit if it was your child in that bed. We fall over ourselves and make all kinds of sacrifices to attend the weddings of people that are close to us. When you have these kinds of relationships, you show up. And they show up for you. It’s just what you do. In a real community you are both one who has needs, and one who fills needs. One who cares and one who is cared for.

All of this is to say that here at BPF, we want you to have real community, and that can only be found among God’s people. We believe that it’s important to:

  • Be “with” other Christ followers
  • Be Devoted to Bible Study
  • Practice intentional habits for growth
  • Be committed to Christ following Community
  • Care for Others

Small groups are a place where God can work His greatest miracles through Bible Study, community and care. It’s the place where lives are forever changed – where people can know and be known, support and be supported. It’s where God’s people become the family that we were created for.  

We aim to create small groups that are interconnected communities of love and depth in a world of hyper-individualism, loneliness, and superficiality. We believe that practicing Christ-following community is stronger than the world and its’ influence. We may not be perfect, but we believe we’ve got some amazing groups who are true examples of the kind of community that Jesus has called us to.

 However, we must choose to be a part of it. It won’t happen by accident. It won’t happen simply because you chose it once, sometime in your past either. This is a choice we must intentionally make each and every day.

If you aren’t currently connected, I’d encourage you to find a way to get connected. I know your schedules are crazy, so I’m not asking you to do something more. I’m asking you to do something different. You may have to say NO to other things in order to say YES to Christ-following community. If you’ve been in a group before or are close to someone who is, join that group. If life forced you out for a season, jump back in. Don’t get comfortable in your isolation. If you’re new or don’t have other connections, the “Rooted” experience is the place to start. It’s a discipleship class designed to build connections around the Bible with some experiences to practice what you learn.

My wife, Miranda and I walked into a “Rooted” group at the beginning of this year and wondered if we were going to make any real connections, but just a few weeks in, we knew we had found some new friends. Our group will be a part of the kickoff event next Sunday and will begin meeting as a regular small group the following week. Here’s the thing though. We’re not just meeting. We became friends during “Rooted” and we have had a couple of other gatherings this summer just so we could stay connected. We seek each other out on Sundays and share what some might consider an annoying (but fun) text feed, but we love it. Our group is looking forward to being together again. It’s not just a meeting. It’s a gathering of friends. This is our hope and our prayer for you as well. Get in a “Rooted” group if you don’t have a small group. Talk to myself or Erin Wilson at the Next Step center in the foyer. You can also sign up for a Rooted class using the QR code on the seatback in front of you.

One last thing: I really want to be clear. I am not asking you to get involved in a group because we need more people in groups. I’m urging you cause I know that God created us for community, and I have found it. I know how much of a difference it has made in my life. I’m not special either. I honestly don’t know anyone in real community who isn’t grateful for it. I’m just “one beggar telling another beggar where to find bread.” Like bread, community fills, and satisfies, sustains us, and gives us life. Now to be clear, Jesus is the bread, but it is community, God’s people, who serve it to us. (by the way, if you think you have community somewhere outside of Jesus, it’s not bread that they are serving you.)

We need people who will stand in our yard and we need to stand in the yards of others. I’m just grateful for what I’ve experienced and I want you to experience it too. Community is what the church is all about ‘cause we come to know Jesus through His people. We hear echoes of His voice and see demonstrations of His love through His people. Community is where we experience the hands and feet of Jesus. 

AMEN

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Chisels for Priorities

This is the first message I shared at Brazos Pointe Fellowship. The series was Chisels: Scriptures that God has used to shape us. I chose the Gibeonite story from Joshua 9 because it shows clearly how the enemy can use good things over time to take territory from the Lord in our hearts.   

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Chisels for Priorities (video)

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My son Kasen is a Jr at Brazoswood now, but he gave me permission to tell you about when he was 6. From early on He was very physical and sports came easy to him. He rode a bike without training wheels the same week that he turned 3. He was always one of the best athletes in every sport he played. However, when He tried out for the swim team at 6, it all changed. To make the team, he was supposed to swim across the pool with a “recognizable stroke.” He jumped confidently into the pool and . . . well . . . let’s just say it was not very “recognizable.” OK, It was bad, but it was fine with me. I didn’t really want to give up all our Saturdays for swim meets. If he made the team, it would have been great, but if he didn’t make the team, it still would have been great.

I didn’t really care, but Kasen was ready to quit. He wasn’t the best swimmer in the pool and it was hard, so he was discouraged and he was just done. In that moment however, something changed in me. I didn’t want a kid who quit anytime something was difficult. I didn’t care about the team, but I cared about my son and I knew this was a teachable moment – a formative moment. I wanted him to learn how to work for something – how to have a little grit. He agreed to practice every day for the next two weeks and when he tried out again, he killed it. He joined the team and then went on to so much more. He went to the State swim meet that same year. He currently holds the state record for 8 and under backstroke, and even got gold medals at a National swim meet a few years later.

More importantly, he knows how to work for something. He doesn’t quit when things are tough. He has grit. This summer, he is actually working as a swim coach on that same team.

Swim has been a good thing for our family. It has been one of the tools God has used for shaping us, and we are grateful for it. I couldn’t let Kasen quit, ‘cause I recognized how that moment could shape him and be important to his future. And it has been.

As the new Discipleship Minister at my church writing about chisels and spiritual formation . . . man this is like music to my ears! This is what my job is all about. And I think it’s important to remember that we are being formed, shaped, molded, and changed all the time. Something is formed in us every day – both good and bad. If I had let Kasen quit that day, it would have formed something in him too – just not the formation that I, as his father would have chosen for him.

We can’t avoid change. Spiritual formation is guaranteed. We will be formed. The question is not if we are being formed, it’s who has the chisel in hand. While God works to make us more like Him, this world aims to chisel away and distort the image of God within us. God wants one thing, the world tears it apart. God will win that battle every day that we abide in Him and give Him the space to work.

On the other hand, if we place our lives in the hands of the world, if we are apathetic about it, or even if we aren’t intentional, we are putting ourselves in danger of being formed into something other than God’s highest and best. This is where it gets tough though. I mean, this moment with Kasen was obvious to me. It was easy to see with his reaction to just give up. It was a clear moment that he could learn something. I saw the moment and I responded well (which I don’t always do.) But it’s not always so simple and easy. These moments can be tough to spot.  Sometimes they aren’t so obvious. Sometimes they’re subtle. Sometimes I miss it. I don’t recognize all the ways I’m being shaped. There are things that creep into our lives. Subtle things. Things that are good things. Things that gradually, bit by bit, grab tiny pieces of our hearts. And if they get too many of those pieces, they can begin to control us. In this way, these good things can become like little “g” gods without us even realizing how it happened. Good things that become like gods are bad things.

I’m going to share a story from the Old Testament today, that I believe is a similar situation. It’s a story about a formational moment that God saw for his children. You see, for 400 years, His chosen people in the Old Testament, the Israelites, had been shaped and forged into slaves in Egypt. God saw them there, as they were, and loved them, but He wanted more for them. He wanted them to represent Him to the entire world, so He miraculously rescued them from slavery and had a plan to bring them into a new land for a new start. Unfortunately, with their slave mentality, they weren’t going to represent Him very well.

God needed to form them and shape them to look more like Himself. (That’s the point for us too.) All of this meant they had to be holy – set apart and spiritually pure. So God had to keep them to Himself. He had to be their only influence. He had to keep them away from distractions or anything that might hinder their holiness. So as they entered the new promised land, God told them not to make any treaties with the people that occupied the land. He even told them to destroy them. . . Destroy the kings and idols that they find in the land. Destroy the distractions.

By the way, this is still God’s desire: You and I are still called to destroy the kings & idols that are found in our hearts.

Destroy the distractions that hinder our holiness.

Now, let’s think a minute about these distractions – the kings they were to destroy. What is a king? Kings hold authority over a specific location or people. They are sovereign within a certain territory and hold power over its’ people. God tells Joshua, (He’s the leader of God’s people at this time.) God tells him to remove all the kings in the land and to destroy them because God Himself would be the only King. He alone is King. He alone is in control. He will not share His authority. If they were going to represent Him to the world, He had to be first place in their lives.

An English writer from the 1800s named John Ruskin says,

“God will put up with a great many things in the human heart, but there is one thing that He will not put up with in it – a second place. He who offers God a second place, offers Him no place.”

As Christ followers, we must remove all the kings and idols that once occupied territory in our hearts.” We must clear the land and offer our hearts to Jesus, the one and only King and then continue to protect and defend God’s territory.

Our church uses a resource called, “Rooted” for small groups. Week 5 is the “strongholds” week. The whole evening is focused on some of the obvious kings that need to be removed from our hearts. Things like fear, pride, bitterness, control, despair, sexual immorality, insecurity, deceit. . . These are clear and easy to spot. As he entered the promised land, Joshua had won battles against some obvious enemies like this at Jericho and Ai. They were strongholds. They were obvious enemies. They were hard to miss.

But the ones I want to talk through today are less obvious. They’re subtle enemies. They are kings that pretend to be friends. These subtle kings are much harder to spot.

Before reading he Scripture below, remember that God is forming His people under the leadership of Joshua. They are former slaves who need to become holy so they can represent God Himself. God has told them to destroy the Kings and idols in the land. At this point in the story, they have done well. Joshua has listened and obeyed God at every turn. They have defeated both Jericho and the city of Ai in some miraculous and incredible ways. Joshua and the people are in a good place when all this goes down. 

Joshua 9: 1 Now when all the kings west of the Jordan heard about these things . . . 2 they came together to wage war against Joshua and Israel. 3 However, when the people of Gibeon (who also live in the Promised land) heard what Joshua had done to Jericho and Ai, 4 they resorted to a ruse: (They disguised themselves) They went as a delegation whose donkeys were loaded with worn-out sacks and old wineskins, cracked and mended. 5 They put worn and patched sandals on their feet and wore old clothes. All the bread of their food supply was dry and moldy. 6 Then they went to Joshua in the camp at Gilgal and said to him and the Israelites, “We have come from a distant country; make a treaty with us.”

7 The Israelites said to the Hivites, “But perhaps you live near us, so how can we make a treaty with you?”

(remember: God said no treaties)

8 “We are your servants,” they said to Joshua. (These are lies. They really want Joshua to serve them.)

But Joshua asked, “Who are you and where do you come from?”

9 They answered: “Your servants have come from a very distant country because of the fame of the Lord your God. For we have heard reports of him: all that he did in Egypt, 10 and all that he did to the two kings of the Amorites east of the Jordan—11 And our elders and all those living in our country said to us, ‘Take provisions for your journey; go and meet them and say to them, “We are your servants; make a treaty with us.”’ 12 This bread of ours was warm when we packed it at home on the day we left to come to you. But now see how dry and moldy it is. 13 And these wineskins that we filled were new, but see how cracked they are. And our clothes and sandals are worn out by the very long journey.”

14 The Israelites sampled their provisions but did not inquire of the Lord. 15 Then Joshua made a treaty of peace with them to let them live, and the leaders of the assembly ratified it by oath.

Wait!?! What?!?! Joshua is a Bible hero. He’s not supposed to do this. He’s supposed to do it right and be our example. Yes . . . but he was deceived. He was tricked. The Gibeonites weren’t obvious kings. They were subtle kings. They deceived Joshua by pretending to be from another land.

Did you notice how he messed up? Where he made his mistake? Did you catch it? Look at vs 14.

Joshua did NOT inquire of the LORD.

Joshua undermined the whole thing by just powering through on his own. The Lord had given him success in two huge victories. He was confident. He was on a winning streak. He thought he was in control. He relied on himself.  He relied on himself.

Alright. So. . . let’s get personal here.

What are the deceptive kings in your life?

Who are your Gibeonites? What is fighting for more territory in your life? If you’re a Christ follower, then Jesus is the one and only King over it all. It’s all His territory. What kings have tricked you? What relationships or habits or activities have crept into your life and consume you? These aren’t “bad” things. They might even be good. These aren’t obvious kings. These are Gibeonites – the subtle deceivers.

I’ve got more of these than I care to admit, but I’m gonna tell you about one.

Actually, in some ways I’ve already told you about it. My story about Kasen and the swim team is where it all started. Over the years, that amazing formational moment with swim has grown into a Gibeonite king. Today, that king goes by another name though: Waterpolo.

Don’t get me wrong. We love waterpolo and the community of people that we have become a part of is amazing. It’s just that it’s not always a great and Godly endeavor either. Both school and club waterpolo have occupied territory in our lives that was once the Lord’s.

We have missed worship services for tournaments. We have spent money on hotels, food, gas, and fees, for tournaments, and practices, and waterpolo experiences. That money could have been used for eternal/kingdom purposes. We have spent emotional energy, shed tears, and been angry over waterpolo drama – not to mention when a ref makes a bad call. I will jump out of my seat screaming and waving my arms around like a fool. I can get caught up in the moment and completely lose control of myself. Just last season, I found myself yelling at a ref so obnoxiously that from the deck of the pool, he yelled back into the stands at me saying, “You think you’re a better ref?” Then he pulled out a little notebook to tell me what dates I could come to referee training. But, it didn’t slow me down. I just kept yelling. When the game was over, a friend said, “You know it’s a bad call when the guy wearing that shirt is screaming.” I looked down at my shirt. It said, “Be Kind” in big bold letters. I felt really small. I didn’t exactly reflect Jesus to that ref. I am a walking contradiction.

Anyway, a bad call is like the fast track for anger to become my king. Anything that can do the things that waterpolo can do to me, probably occupies more of my heart than I really even know.

To be clear, waterpolo is not all bad. There are great and Godly things that have happened too. God has used waterpolo to form us into His image.  We’ve had spiritual conversations with people who aren’t church people and we’ve been able to be a steady and consistent witness with many people in that community.

What I am saying is this: We’ve been on both sides of the line between what glorifies God and what doesn’t.

My guess is that this has happened to you too. It’s probably not waterpolo, but there’s some sort of Gibeonite in your life too. Maybe it’s another sport, or a relationship, maybe social media, or a habit, or something that has become an addiction. I don’t know, but whatever it is, it’s a subtle slope. Slow and seemingly unpredictable.

My family was shaped by a series of tiny decisions. When we started, there were no games on Sundays. However, as my kids got older, schedules got more demanding and one Sunday, we said, “The team is counting on us. We can’t let them down. It’s just one week. Our kids are still connected to the body of Christ.” We justified it. Each decision was small enough that it was easy to write it off.

Like Joshua, we were deceived and like Joshua, I didn’t “inquire of the Lord.” I thought I didn’t need His help ‘cause it seemed like such a small decision. I relied on myself. 

Author, Mark Lawrence says,

There’s a slope towards evil, a gentle gradient that can be ignored at each step, unfelt. It’s not until you look back, see the distant heights where you once lived, that you understand your journey. (from Emperor of Thorns)

That’s where I’m at right now. I’m looking back where we’ve come from and where this path is headed. This is my fault. I can see it clearly now and I’ve got to do something different.

So where do I go from here? How do I fix it? Do I tell my kids it’s over. We’re done with waterpolo? Do we kick waterpolo out of our lives? Sometimes, I think that is the answer, but this time, I don’t think it’s that simple. I think it’s more complicated and nuanced than that. It’s too nuanced for me, so let’s go back to Joshua. What did he do?

After he figured out how he had been deceived: That very same day.

Joshua 9:27 “That day he made the Gibeonites woodcutters and water carriers for the assembly, to provide for the need of the altar of the Lord.”

Do you see it? He didn’t go back on his word. He didn’t break his treaty. He didn’t kick them out. Instead, Joshua made them servants of the Lord. It’s genius really. 

He put God back in His rightful place as King. He put the Lord over the Gibeonites!

I think that’s my answer. I think it’s your answer – the answer for all of us. No matter if your Gibeonite is waterpolo, or social media, an addiction, a relationship, or whatever.

Man, we gotta put God back on the throne. We gotta make Him King over it all. He deserves to sit in His rightful place, which is never 2nd place. In the ways your Gibeonite serves Him, you’re good. In the ways that it doesn’t, well. . . those are tougher decisions, but they are decisions that we know the answers to. They’re just decisions that we don’t like. We’ve got to repent and turn back to God. The issue here is more about having the courage to make the right decision. How will we choose to be shaped in those moments?

Will you choose the chisel in God’s hand or the one in the hand of your Gibeonite?

Here’s what I know. We’ve got to do something different. We can’t just keep doing what we’ve been doing. We’ve got to be intentional. Like my son Kasen, it’s gonna take hard work and grit. When God swings the hammer at His chisel, it will be painful. It hurts to cut these things out of our lives, but they will be worth it. We will look more like him as we create new practices and habits so our reflex is to make Jesus King.

There are things we can learn from Joshua’s mistake. We must:

  • Be Wise: Inquire of the Lord. Don’t be deceived.
  • Be Ready: Refuse to rely on yourself.
  • Prioritize: Make Jesus King over everything – especially your Gibeonites.

This is our church core value: Jesus over Everything. Right?

By the way, I should finish the story. In the next chapter, the Gibeonites call upon Joshua to protect them. Who do they think they are? They want him to serve them because of a treaty they tricked him into. Joshua doesn’t abandon them. (which is what I would have been tempted to do thinking now they’ll get what they deserve now) Instead, Joshua comes with his whole army and defends the very people who deceived him. That’s crazy to me. But Joshua did what Jesus would do years later.

As the true King, Jesus rescues you in spite of your sin. Even if you come to Him pretending you’re someone else, He forgives you and saves you and protects you. He isn’t fooled. He knows every part of you and still makes an irrevocable treaty with you. Are you hearing me? He knows every part of you and still makes a treaty with you. This treaty is authorized by His work on the cross and it’s signed in blood. It’s an everlasting treaty and it gives you full rights as a child of the King. The King who will rule and reign forever. If you invite other Gibeonites into His territory, He will subdue them. In Him, there is only victory. Let Him be King of your heart and your life. It’s the best decision you’ll ever make. Jesus is King! Jesus is King! Jesus is King!

Prayer:

Dear God, We thank You and praise You that You are King. You rule and reign over everything. The heavens and earth declare Your glory. The planets were formed and move around their orbits at Your command. The wind and the waves, they listen to You. All of creation responds to You with a resounding, “Yes!” And yet Lord, when I look at my own heart, full of kings and idols, hardened and distracted. I have the audacity to tell You “No.” Lord, forgive me. Turn me from these ways, back to You. Teach me to inquire of You at every turn. Give me courage to choose the chisel in You hand. Send Your Spirit to lead me to destroy the distractions so that I might be holy and represent You well. Lord, You are King over everything. Today, may You be king over my heart too. AMEN. 

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Esther was Trafficked

Esther was Trafficked!

Esther is remembered for standing up to a foreign king on behalf of her people. She is regarded as a hero and rightfully so, but most of the time that her story is told, we skip over the fact that she was trafficked. Think about it. Originally, Esther was a humble little girl who was mistreated and forcefully placed into an environment where she would be trafficked for the pleasure of a powerful man, the king.

Let’s go back and consider this part of her story a little more. It actually starts with a decision by Queen Vashti.

Esther Chapter 1 describes a 180 day feast hosted by King Xerxes for all his nobles, governors, officials, and servants to display his greatness.

Does it really take 6 months of partying to demonstrate your power or is this guy a little self-centered? Or maybe he’s using this feast to compensate for some sort of insecurity?

Anyway, a 6 month party is pretty extravagant. After this party, he throws another 7 day party for all the people in the city. It’s a high-brow affair with very over-the-top food, drink, décor, golden vessels, couches, marble, and all the finery. The wine was being distributed freely without any restrictions on anyone. It was an open bar for everyone.

It most likely devolved into a drunken brawl rather quickly – a week long tailgate.

Queen Vashti (Xerxes’ wife) had a smaller feast for the women in the palace during this time too, but she was interrupted on the 7th day by a request from her husband. He was “merry with wine” and wanted her to come to his “feast” wearing her crown so all his drunken “friends” could see her “beauty.”

This sounds like an insecure man to me again – drunk and insecure so he had to bring her in so others could gawk at her and be “impressed” that he had such an incredible woman.

There’s something else you miss here if you don’t study the culture. You see, the custom of the day invited wives to these banquets too, until the time when the men began to get drunk, and at that time the “dancers” would come in to “entertain” them. Wives typically left the banquet when the “dancers” arrived. When Xerxes asked her to come to the banquet, it seems obvious that she had already left the party. Most likely the men were already drunk and the “dancers” were busy “entertaining.” Also, when Xerxes asks her to come wearing her “royal crown,” most Biblical scholars understand this to mean that he was asking her to appear before them all wearing ONLY her crown. Xerxes was asking her to appear naked in front of a bunch of drunk men who were in a party environment where they were free to touch and play with all the other women “dancers.” She knew her husband. He was insecure and was just trying to show her off in front of these other men. She understood the danger that she would be putting herself in. He is equating her with the “dancers.” At this point, he is no longer treating her as his “wife.”

Queen Vashti refuses his invitation. I mean, it’s no wonder she refused. What self-respecting woman would have appeared? Right? When she refuses to join him, she is actually risking her life. King Xerxes, of course, is angry and so he goes to his “yes” men to have his ears tickled and get the emotional support that he needed. Again, we see his insecurity playing out in these behaviors. They basically say, “Forget her. Let’s go find you ‘the most beautiful girl in the world.’” Queen Vashti is banished from the kingdom and Esther Chapter 2 begins with a description of the process of the search to find a replacement wife for King Xerxes.

Now, Esther was a young woman who lived with her older cousin Mordecai because she had lost both of her parents. He loved her “as his own daughter.” When Xerxes’ order was proclaimed, she “was taken” into the custody of the man in charge of the harem. She was forced out of her home. In time, Esther impressed him and won the favored position among the girls. During her preparation time in the palace, Mordecai walked around the courtyard so he could keep his eye on her. He truly thought of her as a daughter and was concerned for her safety and well-being. He had warned her not to let the king know about her lowly Jewish heritage.

It must have horrified him to imagine the things she would have endured and the abuse that awaited her as one of the girls in the king’s harem. As her adopted father, it must have pained him greatly knowing that there wasn’t really anything he could do to get her out of this awful situation. In spite of the way this is often taught, this was no beauty pageant with a scholarship and glamorous travel schedule awaiting. In reality, it was a series of events that started with a forced removal from their homes and ended in sexual assault. These girls were taken away from their families and homes, isolated from the relationships that rooted them, denied the practice of their faith/beliefs, pressured into changing their appearances and mannerisms, stripped of any self-expression so they could conform to the whims of another, and they were eventually sexually assaulted with no other intention than to pleasure the king until he had chosen a bride. Esther wasn’t a pageant girl. She was an innocent young woman who was forced into sexual submission by her circumstances and a king with an inferiority complex and low self-esteem. He was using her to fill his own emptiness and desires. Esther was trafficked. And there were countless others who not only allowed it to happen, but encouraged it and aided in the process.

After abusing Esther as well as many other young women, King Xerxes eventually chooses her to take the place of Vashti and be his wife. From our vantage point it may appear that there were some privileges and advantages to the title of Queen, but that’s what a trafficker does. He makes “the life” appear to be a great opportunity. The reality however, is that none of those things could give back her innocence. None of those things could heal the trauma or fill the void left by the abuse that she had endured. She may have had the title of Queen, but she was damaged, hurt, and broken by this forced relationship and the constant suffering of the continued abuse.

However, as the book continues and the story develops, we find Esther to be a wonderful example of a woman of faith. In the midst of her circumstances and her abuse, God was with her. She may have been damaged, but as one of God’s chosen people, she still found her identity in the Lord. When a plot to kill the Israelites (her people) is revealed, she risks her own life and goes before the King to save her people. There are at least 5 risks she took.

  1. Initiating a conversation with the King broke the law and could result in death.
  2. In order to make her request, she had to reveal that she was a Jew.
  3. Laws were irreversible in the Persian Empire.
  4. Haman was 2nd most powerful man on the earth.
  5. Esther had to be extremely gentle and careful with her speech because the King had so many insecurities. It’s difficult to get someone to change their mind without offending their pride.

In spite of her lowly heritage, Esther uses her position of influence and her relationship with the king, to stand up to him, and save her people. Rather than asserting power and making demands, Esther works behind the scenes relationally to influence and lead the people around her. It is her quiet strength that influences the evil king.

Esther and Vashti are both women to be admired. Both stood up to injustice.

Vashti represents one way of handling the evil requests of ungodly men. She starts from a position of power and stood for what she believed was right, but she also had to be willing to sacrifice her power/position to make her stance.

Esther represents another way. She starts in a humble position and plays along working behind the scenes to build an influential relationship. Out of this relationship, she stands up for what she believes is right as well.

Both women are guided by their conscience. Esther is empowered by her faith.

Now let’s be clear: In spite of how this passage is sometimes taught. God did NOT put Esther in this situation. It was NOT God’s intention for her to be trafficked. Human sin, and specifically King Xerxes and his men are the abusers/traffickers here. God however, is able to reach into any and every situation and rescue us or use us for His glory and His purposes. As Genesis 50:20 describes, “What man meant for evil, God meant for good.” When we experience evil, we must recognize that God can turn it around and make good of it. As a loving father and one who is all powerful, He is able, and He is willing.

What does this mean for us? How should we respond? I’d encourage you to ask yourself several questions:

Like Vashti, is there some evil that you need to stand up against or a wrong you could make right? Are you willing to pay the price of your own reputation, wealth, or social standing to do the right thing?

Like Esther, what kind of influence do you have with the people who surround you? Is there someone who could serve as a Mordecai for you who encourages and supports you through your difficult circumstance? Do the people around you notice your Godly demeanor? In what ways do you stand out from everyone else? Is Jesus’ name lifted up? Are people encouraged? Are people being treated well or even rescued/saved due to your influence? Is there a way God could use you in a difficult situation? Is He calling you to be involved in His work?

Esther was trafficked, but you and I have been too. God created you, but sin has coerced and convinced us that it has a better way. Its intent is to enslave us where we will be used and abused for the sake of its own glory and satisfaction. The world wants to use and abuse us for its own purposes. It seeks to isolate us from those who truly care for us so it can have us all to itself. Sin “crouches at the door and desires to have us.” (Gen 4:7) It will use us and destroy us just as Xerxes did to Esther. Like her, we have been trafficked.

There’s good news though. In the midst of her enslavement, God made a way for her people to be saved. Esther suffered through all kinds of abuse, but eventually God used her to save His people. In the midst of our enslavement, God has made a way for us to be saved too. Jesus’ blood on the cross is evidence of the suffering He endured, but through this suffering, God has provided a way for us to be rescued as well. Jesus is our rescuer. He is our Savior.

Esther was trafficked.

You have been trafficked.

Esther was used by God to save others.

Will you allow God to use you?

 

PS – If you’d like more information about Human Trafficking, check out  Refuge for Women .

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A Dragon in My Nativity

Thank you to Sarah Manning who first shared these ideas with a women’s group from our church. (Grace Bible Church, Clute TX) Here’s a pic from my house a few years ago. My daughter, Kesleigh (now a 7th grader) decided that she wanted a smurf in our nativity. He sorta looks like a shepherd right?!?! Over the years we’ve had lots of different characters join our nativity – Lightning McQueen, Larry the Cucumber. . . you name it.  I guess the truth is we all have some unwanted guests in our nativitys. They might be people, but grief could be an unwanted guest too, or disappointment, or feelings of inadequacy. Are there some people or circumstances this year that just “aren’t right?” Christmas can be hard – really hard. Maybe you’ve lost someone and Christmas is just gonna be hard. Maybe you’ve been forced to rethink your finances and you can’t do Christmas the way you’d like to. Maybe you’ve got crazy people in your family and getting together just isn’t enjoyable anymore. Whatever it is: You’ve got a dragon in your nativity.  Yes – I said a dragon – big and overbearing, disgusting. Maybe your dragon spews fire with its’ words, or lurks around the season looking for the moment to break in and destroy something. Or maybe he quietly torments your innermost thoughts.

Dragons. We’ve all got ‘em. I’ve got a dragon in my nativity too. This year will be one of the first Christmas’s since my brother passed away. We’re going to have some tough moments and there’s no question that my sister is gonna cry over it at some point.  There’s a dragon in my nativity too. He doesn’t belong. He seeks to destroy our celebration and ruin the whole thing. He will sneak into our celebration to try to have his way with us.

But here’s the thing. Maybe you never knew it, but there’s a dragon in the real nativity too. Revelation 12:1-6 describes a pregnant woman who is about to give birth when a dragon appears and waits so he can “devour the baby the moment he is born.” The dragon stands there ready and waiting to bring destruction. However, the child is saved and then the woman goes into the wilderness.

This is the Bethlehem story. Herod is the dragon. He plots with the wisemen so he can discover where Jesus is and go kill him. When the wisemen don’t fall for his scheme, he decides to kill all the babies under the age of 2, but God warns Mary and Joseph and they flee to the wilderness of Egypt for a while.

There was a dragon in the first nativity. His name was Herod.

There are dragons lurking around the corner throughout all of Scripture: (throughout all of our lives too)

The dragon in the Moses story is the Pharaoh who tries to kill all the Jewish babies. Of course God makes a way for Moses to live and eventually rescue the people.

In the garden of Eden, the snake tempts the woman and seeks to bring destruction upon she and Adam. (Which by the way, Genesis 3 says the woman’s offspring will destroy the serpent.)

In the other garden where Jesus prays the dragon reveals himself as Roman soldiers who arrest Jesus and begin the process which would lead to His death on the cross.

GK Chesterton wrote, “Fairy Tales do not tell children that dragons exist. Children already know that dragons exist. Fairy tales tell children that dragons can be killed.”

I’m going to steal his quote and change it, but here’s what I believe.

“The Bible doesn’t tell people that dragons exist. People already know dragons exist. The Bible’s intent is to tell us the dragons have already been defeated.”

You have a dragon in your classroom. It’s exactly the same dragon that’s in my classroom. And by the way, it’s not the kid that popped into your mind. The dragon is the fear, sin, death, and destruction that surround that kid. It’s the evil that influences him and the evil that he allows to control him like a puppet.

The true dragon slayer doesn’t destroy people. He captures hearts and works diligently and sacrificially to destroy the fear, sin, death, and destruction that influence and them. During the worst possible situation, on the cross, enduring unimaginable torment, Jesus isn’t angry with his captors. He actually says “Forgive them, for they know not what they do.”

Jesus’ attitude in that moment is compassion. He doesn’t actually do it, but when I reflect on this whole thing, I hear “Capturing Kids Hearts” questions with Jesus saying, “What are you doing? What are you supposed to be doing?” It’s a compassionate response, but forces our students to own their behaviors.

The point is, Jesus doesn’t destroy the people who are trying to destroy Him. Let’s be clear. He could have destroyed them with just a word, but the people aren’t the dragon. The true dragon was Jesus’ objective. The dragon is the fear, sin, death, and destruction that controlled those people. The people are just puppets under the influence of the dragon.

And here is the good news!! If you go back to that passage in Revelation, you see it too. The people triumph over the dragon, “by the blood of the lamb.” Yes! We win!! Jesus, our knight in shining armor, withdrew His sword (which according to Heb 4:12 is the Word of God) and conquered the dragon. On the cross He stepped into death and then walks out of the tomb defeating the dragon. The power of fear, sin, death, and destruction had no hold on Him. And when we walk in faith, it has no hold on us either.

Yes – there is a dragon in my nativity, and in my house, and my classroom, and everywhere I go, BUT there is also a dragon slayer named Jesus who was born, and lived to destroy that dragon. And now by faith, the dragon slayer lives in me, and you, and all of those who call on His name.

Whatever dragon you encounter this season and whatever power it holds on you, remember that you have a greater power, a dragon slayer. He is just a prayer away. He has already defeated your dragon and empowers you with a sword of your own – the Word of God.

Romans 8:37 “We are more than conquerors, through Him who loved us.”

AMEN.

 

Here’s a great video that goes with this message too:

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Following Jesus after Camp

Summer is here! And that means students from all over the country will be attending church camp. New friends, crazy games & competitions, times for worship, bible study & prayer – all this combines and intersects with the work of Jesus in students lives and create an incredible experiences. Thousands will make decisions for Christ over the next few weeks, but what does that mean? How will they move forward in their faith when they go back to their ordinary lives? That’s what this post is about.

The decision to follow Christ is not just a decision. It’s a commitment. I would say this decision is like a wedding. (and I believe I can show that Jesus likens it to a wedding too, but that’s another post.)

Before Miranda and I got married we lived separate lives.  We lived in different homes. She had her job and bank account and I had mine. Although there were some who had in common, we had our own sets of friends. Our own habits and routines, our own lives. We were separated. On our wedding day, we stood before almost everyone we knew and proclaimed the decision that we had made – a decision which was a clear reflection our relationship. From that day forward, we were choosing to live differently. . . . . to live “with” each other. . . . . to live together.

This is what the decision for Christ is. It is a reflection of the relationship you have with Him. It is a decision to live “with” Him. . . . . to live together with Jesus.

At our wedding the pastor asked us a few questions. You probably know the questions.

He said, “Steve, will you take Miranda to be your wife, to live together in a holy marriage?  Will you love her, comfort her, honor and keep her for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and health, and forsaking all others, be faithful only to her, for as long as you both shall live?”

Notice how the questions are worded. “Will you take. . . . .” Will you love. . . . .”  In our pre-marital counseling, the pastor explained that the answer to those questions would simply be, “I will.”

What would have happened if I had said, “I will,  if I feel like it?”

The crowd would have gasped and Miranda probably would have slapped me across the face. “If I feel like it” isn’t a commitment.

The correct answer is simply “I will.” There are no ifs. When we make a commitment, we are saying that we’ll do whatever it takes to make it happen. We’re willing to make sacrifices and do the right thing even when things look bad. I will choose to act in love for Miranda even when she treats me bad –  even when I don’t like her – even when things are tough. Love is not a feeling. It is a choice. Jesus didn’t feel like going to the cross. He chose it in spite of how He felt. (Remember, how He asked God if there was another way, but then committed to God’s will? Check Mt 26:39) “In sickness and health, for richer or poorer,” no matter what, Miranda will receive my love. I will choose to love her. That is commitment. There are no ifs.

Our relationship with Jesus is like this too. If we want a real relationship with Jesus our answer is also, “I will.” Unfortunately, I see people adding many “ifs.”

– I’ll spend time with Jesus if I don’t have to get up early.
– I’ll go to church if my friends are going to be there.
– I’ll do what He asks as longs as it doesn’t cost me something.
– I’ll read the Bible if I have time.
– . . . . if it won’t be awkward.
– . . . . if I can still hang out with my old friends.
– . . . . if I don’t have something else going on.

NO!!! The answer to the question is a simple, “I WILL.” If we’re committed to Jesus, we must make time. We must be willing to put Him first. We must make sacrifices. We must be willing to follow Him even when it’s awkward or uncomfortable.

Church camp is great in many of the same ways as a wedding. Miranda and I had an incredible wedding. The people who surrounded us mean the world to us. That day we hung out with friends. We laughed. We read Scripture. We cried. We worshipped. We prayed. We ate. We danced. And then we left. Our family and friends threw stuff at us as we ran to our cars. Miranda jumped in her car and I got in mine and then we drove off and went our separate directions.

. . . . . . . Hold up.

. . . . . . Wait.

You did what? Separate cars? Separate directions?

NO – of course not. We rode off together in one car and began our life together. There’s sort of a crazy story, but we actually had a friend who drove us. The commitment that we had just made was starting and from that day forward, we have been together. Scripture says that the two of us “became one” that day, and since then, our lives have never looked the same. It’s been 17yrs and our commitment has grown over time. It’s a beautiful relationship.

Unfortunately, I think church camp decisions for Christ often look the other way. Students have incredible experiences at camp and decide to follow Jesus and live differently, but they don’t really understand the commitment side of it. The church camp experience has offered them all the things my wedding did:  Friends. Laughter. Bible Study. Worship. Tears. and incredible joy. Students begin a relationship with Jesus, but on the last day of camp, they leave in separate vehicles.

Charles Spurgeon (Mark 4 Commentary) says, “There are many more, whose religion must be sustained by enthusiastic surroundings. They seem to have been baptized in boiling, water; and unless the temperature around them is kept up to that point, they wither away . . . the religion that is born of mere excitement will die when the excitement is over.”

Friends. Don’t let this be you. Don’t leave camp in your car. Get in Jesus’ car and let Him drive you home. Allow Jesus to be in control. Remember that if you have committed to following Him, then you are “one” with Him. He also gives you the Holy Spirit to empower you to make the right decisions. Recognize that He is always with you. Allow Him to shape your daily schedule and calendar. Find time – be intentional about doing all the things you did at camp. They will deepen your “oneness” with Him.

– Hang out with Christian friends
– Study Scripture
– Worship
– Sing
– Pray
– Laugh
– and find ways to serve others.

I understand that none of these things is probably as easy to find as it is at church camp, but they are all important in deepening your relationship with Jesus. Your relationship with Him IS absolutely worth it. The effort you put into these things is a reflection of your commitment to Him – that means that your effort in making these things happen is actually an act of worship. By working behind the scenes to deepen your relationship with Jesus, you are honoring and valuing Him and that is what worship is all about. The effort alone will draw you closer to Him.

Oh – and by the way. You’re not alone. God has given us the church (His people not the building) to help us. Find someone else to help you with these things or to walk you through the process of starting your relationship with Jesus. It could be a friend or someone more mature in their faith. Youth ministers and youth leaders usually love this sort of thing too so they’re usually easy to ask. There are also some great books that can help. Here’s one from the guys at YM360: New: First Steps for New Christ Followers

PS – I just spent an incredible week of Church Camp with a bunch of really fine people!  Although I spent more than 20yrs in ministry, this was my first time back with them in over 10yrs.  It was great! Everyone was wonderful! Shout out to:

      •  The YM360 staff (rec leaders, bible study leaders, drama team, administrative team, and I’m sure there are others I’m missing)
      • the band (Logan Walter)
      • the speaker (our own pastor, Chad Poe)
      • the Louisiana College staff who housed and fed us
      • the youth leaders and volunteers who brought their students

God used this team to stretch our students in their spiritual lives. He used them to draw them closer to one another and to help them see the bigger picture of the body of Christ outside their own church walls and even into other parts of the world. God used this team to strengthen relationships in people who have attended church together for years, but have never really spoken to one another. God used this team to convict us of sin, to direct us to the forgiveness found in Jesus, and to begin to think about new ways of living in light of the Gospel. Thank you for serving. Thank you for allowing God to use you.

Our students won the volleyball tournament!

 

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Broken Cups

Personal Story:
This issue of emptiness was one of the biggest factors that drove me to the place where I gave my life to Christ and eventually chose to follow Him. Up to my years in Jr High, I had lived a pretty normal, suburban, middle-class lifestyle. My parents were married and remained together. I always had food, shelter, etc. I had never really lost anyone in my life. By all accounts, everything looked great from the outside. However, on the inside, I was dying. I felt empty. I felt like I didn’t really matter. During those years, I tried several things to fill the void inside of me. I tried popularity and hanging out with all the “right” people. As much as I could at my age, I tried money and bought cool stuff to fill the emptiness. I tried sports and accomplishments. I got good grades and did well in sports. I did well in all of these things and learned much from those experiences, but none of them satisfied the emptiness that I felt. No matter how I filled myself up, I had a leak. The satisfaction never lasted long.

When I finally came to Christ, all of that changed. No matter what my circumstances were, I could trust in Him to settle my heart. He filled me in places that I didn’t even know were empty. Today, sin still creeps in and I have leaks, but He forgives and makes me whole. Over the years Jesus has mended many of my cracks and the places that I leak have grown smaller. He has not only become my waterfall, but also the potter who repairs me and molds me into His own likeness.

Steve’s Advice:
We are all broken. We are sinful and broken. We are broken in different ways, but still broken. If we were cups, we’d have cracks. Some would even be shattered into splintered pieces. When we realize this, we can have compassion on people. We can love those who may not treat us very well. When we love one another, it’s amazing, but we can never truly fill each other ’cause as we pour ourselves out for others, there’s a crack leaking out the other end. Our only satisfaction is in Jesus Christ. He alone can satisfy and fill us to overflowing. He is the unending “waterfall” whose complete and perfect love was poured out upon the cross.

The song, “Break in the Cup” by David Wilcox describes what I’m trying to say.

Famous Words:

Break in the Cup – David Wilcox lyrics

I try so hard to please you
to be the love that fills you up
I try to pour on sweet affection
but I think you got a broken cup.

Because you can’t believe I love you
I try to tell you that there is no doubt
but as soon as fill you with all I’ve got
that little break will let it run right out

I cannot make you happy
I’m learning love and money never do
but I can pour myself out ’til I’m empty
trying to be just who you’d want me to

I cannot make you happy
even though our love is true
for there’s a break in the cup that holds love
inside of you

Now I begin to understand you
as you explain the fear you feel
It’s when you see me fall into that sorrow
that makes you doubt the love is real

because the lonely wind still blows through me
I turn away so you can’t see
but now how can I still be so empty
with all this love that you pour on me?

I guess you cannot make me happy
and that’s a money-back guarantee
but you can pour yourself out ’til you’re empty
trying to be just who’d I want you to be

You cannot make me happy
It’s just the law of gravity
and that break in the cup that holds love
inside of me

So if you’re tempted to rescue me
drowning in this quicksand up to my neck
before you grab my hand to save me
why don’t you ask me if I’m finished yet?

You cannot make me happy
not when there’s empty inside of me
but you can pull yourself right in here with me
My misery’d love to have your company

We cannot trade empty for empty
We must go to the waterfall
for there’s a break in the cup that holds love
a break in the cup that holds love
inside us all

Song:
Break in the Cup – David WIlcox
I Leak – Mike Briscoe

God’s Word:
Romans 3:23 – “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.”

Ephesians 2:1-3 – “And you were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience— among whom we all once lived in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind.”

Steve’s Advice:
When Scripture says “All have sinned and fallen short,” God means “all.” No one has escaped the pull of sin and the death of sin. We are all sinners (even that person you think is so perfect), and so no one can fill us up or make us feel “full” except for Jesus. There is a classic movie called Jerry MacGuire, where the main character says to his girl, “You complete me.” This is not even possible. No man or woman on earth can complete you. Only Jesus can “complete” you. . . actually, that is exactly the work He continually does in our lives once we choose to follow Him. Just remember that you will not be satisfied in anyone or anything until you are fully satisfied in Jesus. Keep your eyes on Him.

God’s Word:
Ephesians 3:17-19 – “That Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith – that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth , and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.”

Romans 15:13 – “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.”

Colossians 2:9-10 – “For in him [Jesus] the whole fullness of deity dwells bodily, and you have been filled in him, who is the head of all rule and authority.”

Matthew 12:334b – “For out of the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks.”

John 16:33 – “In the world you will have tribulation, but take heart; I have overcome the world.”

Famous Words:
“You fill me with all I need, if only I didn’t leak.” – Mike Briscoe, Song – I Leak

 

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Be Saved

Steve’s Advice:
The first and foremost piece of advice that I can give to anyone (This series is written for my kids in particular, but this one applies to everyone) is to BE SAVED!! We are all drowning. We are all killing ourselves with our selfish actions, our sin. You can’t “earn” your way to heaven or out of hell, but JESUS has done ALL the work!!!!

 

Personal Story:
My friend Scott Crenshaw used to say, “Can I tell you something that no one else in the church will tell you? It’s sort of like a secret. Ready? Here it is: You don’t need Jesus to go to heaven. It’s true. Everyone always says that you’ve got to have Jesus if you want to go to heaven, but they’re wrong. You can go to heaven without Jesus if you live a ‘perfect’ holy life.” Scott always goes on to explain that if you don’t have any sin, you won’t be separated from Him and so you’ll go to heaven without Jesus.

 

Steve’s Advice:
That’s the problem though. Right? Sin. None of us is sinless. None of us is perfect. We are all guilty. Some sins are practically universal – lying, selfishness, pride, lust, hate, and the list could go on and on and on. The only way we can be in the presence of God is without sin – without even a hint of sin and we carry it everywhere we go. We can’t “change our ways” enough. We can’t willpower our way to holiness. We all fall short of perfection – short of sinlessness – short of holiness. This is why we need Jesus. His blood covers us. He paid for our sin on the cross. His blood covers us.

 

Personal Story:
My friend Scott also tells a story. His young son wanted to take the family out to lunch after church one day. They went and ordered as they normally would and enjoyed their lunch. When the waiter came over and handed them the check, his son reached into his pockets and pulled out everything he had. After all the coins had collected on the table, they counted out less than 3 dollars. It wasn’t enough. Although his heart and intentions were good, it simply wasn’t enough……. But someone had to pay. Right?!?! Someone had to pay. My friend Scott paid the price for his loved one’s meals that day ’cause he was able.

 

Steve’s Advice:
Jesus is the same. The price for sin is death and He paid the bill for us.

 

God’s Word:
Romans 6:23 – For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

 

Steve’s Advice:
Jesus paid the price for us because He alone is able. We will never be enough. ‘Cause we are sinful. We don’t earn His love by doing “good” things either. It is a gift. My friend “covered” for his son because he was able to give him that gift. Jesus’ blood covers us and he chose to give His life for our benefit.

 

This is the kind of thing I must admit that I lose sight of. I’ve lived as a Christian for many years and continue to forget that I can’t earn His love. I still find myself thinking that because I have done this or that for God, that I will somehow receive His blessings. I catch myself thinking, “Oh my kids will be alright. I’ve raised them to believe in Jesus.” However, my efforts don’t guarantee anything. It’s only by the grace of God that my children will know the Lord and serve Him with their lives. Of course I have an influence, but ultimately, the best thing I can do is pray for God’s intervention in their lives. I can’t earn His favor with my “good works.” As a matter of fact. My “good” works aren’t really that good at all.

 

God’s Word:
Isaiah 64:6b – All our righteous acts are like filthy rags.

 

Steve’s Advice:
Even the things we think are good are still polluted by sin in one way or another. Even with a subtle sinful influence, we bring impure acts to the Lord. Our “good” works are still not “holy” works. God doesn’t owe us anything. ‘Cause we can’t do enough to earn anything.

 

God’s Word:
Ephesians 2:8-9 – For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast.

 

Famous Words:
“We cannot be so bad Christ might abandon us… because we never did anything good enough to cause Him to love us.” – Chad Poe

 

“Our huffing and puffing to impress God, our scrambling for brownie points, our thrashing about trying to fix ourselves while hiding our pettiness and wallowing in guilt are nauseating to God and are a flat out denial of the Gospel of grace.” – Brennan Manning

 

“Sin does not make us bad. It makes us dead.” – Scott Crenshaw

 

Song:
Saved by Grace – Jadon Lavik
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Arrows – Be Brave

Steve’s Word:
I am very blessed to have my children. God has shown immense and undeserved favor to me in bringing my kids into my life. I feel humble and inadequate for the task of raising them to know Him and to bring Him glory, but by His grace, empowered by His Spirit, I will. Notice, I did not say “try.” Yoda says, “Do or do not. There is no try.” And that is very appropriate here. “Trying” is not good enough in this monumental endeavor. It’s not enough to “try” to raise them as God has called. I must “do.”


God’s Word: 
Psalm 127:4 – Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one’s youth. Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them.

Steve’s Word:
According to this verse, my kids are my arrows, but what does that mean? What do arrows do? Answer: They are launched into the world by the archer (the Father) in order to advance His army into enemy territories. It is my prayer that their young lives will be spent “becoming” arrows and that as they grow, they will be launched into the world to “take ground” from the enemy so that God’s army can be advanced. The arrow’s purpose is to help Him with His purposes for His Kingdom and His glory. Arrows also go into dangerous places – enemy territory. They take risks for a greater purpose and penetrate the darkness with light. Arrows are aimed at specific targets, not just thrown out randomly. The archer “plans” his shot. God is a skilled archer, He has a plan and is able to place you in the exact place He needs you to be.

My children are the only arrows I have and I pray that they will be all of these things. It will take bravery, but they are children of God who I pray will be empowered by the Spirit of God when one day they choose to honor Him and give Him their lives.

God’s Word:
Romans 8:31b – If God is for us, who can be against us?

Psalm 45:5 – Your arrows are sharp in the heart of the king’s enemies; the peoples fall under you.

Famous Words:
“With God, you are stronger than your struggles and more fierce than your fears. God provides comfort and strength to those who trust in Him. Be encouraged, keep standing, and know that everything’s going to be alright.” – Germany Kent

“Playing it safe is risky. The greatest risk is taking no risks.” – Mark Batterson

“You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.” – Khalil Gibran

“Life is like an arrow. The farther back you are pulled, the farther forward you will end up.” – Unknown

“A single arrow is easily broken; a quiver of ten is not.” – Japanese proverb

“Jesus didn’t die to make us safe, but to make us dangerous.” – Mark Batterson

“You must not only aim right, but draw the bow with all your might.” – Henry David Thoreau

“Courage is contagious. When a brave man takes a stand, the spines of others are often stiffened.” – Billy Graham

Personal Story:
I haven’t had the pleasure of launching my children out into the world just yet, so the only story I can tell is about some of my students from when I was in youth ministry. One of my greatest joys is watching my ex-students who have grown up and continued to follow Jesus into their adult lives. I have old students who have done mission work all over the world. Off the top of my head I can think of students who have served in Egypt, Dominican Republic, Costa Rica, Liberia, Scotland, South Africa, China, and Thailand. I have also been able to download sermon podcasts from some of my old students who are pastors. Others have been involved in youth ministry, music ministry, church planting, and other local church ministries. I can think of at least 15 of my ex-students who have served in ministry in a full-time role. There are countless others who are serving in other ways. I even have connections with a couple of my old students who are living out their faith in Hollywood. One is in the modeling/acting world and another is a musician. Both travel all over the world regularly and share their faith in each of those places.

One of my favorite things is when there is some sort of event that brings these people back together. A couple years ago, we got to attend a retirement party for our friend Jon Godbold and we had the chance to see and catch up with a lot of those students. It’s truly a joy for me to watch how they are serving the Lord and to know that God was working among us during our times together to lead them to those places. If that’s how I feel about ex-students, I can’t imagine how great it will be to watch my own children grow into the people that God has planned for them to be. I’m excited to watch as they are launched into the world and take ground for His kingdom. As the verse says, I am blessed to have some arrows in my quiver.

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The Sword of Gratitude

Darkness closes in. The silence is deafening. My vision is clouded. I can’t see a way out. Death marches on, threatening, intimidating, and piercing the very depths of my being. There is nothing I can do but wait. . . with heavy breathing and an anxious spirit, I wait for the inevitable. These are dark times. I shovel the darkness out as fast as I can only to discover that another onslaught of more darkness has already arrived in its’ place. I just keep shoveling, but I don’t seem to be making any progress. I am overcome by the throng pressing in and I can’t seem to find a footing.

What should I do? Or maybe the better question – What did Jesus do?

Luke 22 describes the events right before Judas’ betrayal – right before the crucifixion. When the darkness had amassed its’ hordes and was preparing to destroy  Him. . . when death came knocking, with the cross just ahead of Him, Jesus sat down to a Passover meal with His friends. There, He took bread and gave thanks.  Jesus took the time and gave thanks right before His ultimate battle with darkness.  Think about it. He could have done anything He wanted, but He chose to hang out with friends (disciples), remember all His Father had done (Passover meal), and give thanks. The sword Jesus wielded that night was gratitude. And make no mistake. . . gratitude is a sword. It pierces the darkness with light!

Think about it. Gratitude is worship. It’s a recognition of who God is and what He has done. This is worship. Even when we are grateful for a kindness of another person, those things are ultimately a picture of the Gospel. A “thank you” is the acknowledgement of an undeserved kindness, and that’s the Gospel – an underserved kindness. When we are surrounded by darkness, we can choose to try to shovel out the darkness or we can choose gratitude. When we thank God, we remember who He is and what He has done and we begin to reflect the glory of the Gospel. Jesus’ light pierces that darkness as our gratitude remembers, and praises and talks about His work and His character. Darkness trembles at His name. Darkness flees. There isn’t even a battle between light and darkness. Light wins every time. With even an ounce of light, darkness hides it’s face. Gratitude is the sword that defeats the darkness. Gratitude shines the light of Christ into every circumstance. Since it brings light, gratitude always wins in a battle against the darkness.  (nerdy sidenote: Gratitude is probably more like a “Light Saber” than a sword.)

Here are a few Scriptural examples of God’s people remembering and being grateful before a battle with darkness:

        • 2 Chronicles 20:22 – Jehoshaphat and his men praised God and then the LORD set an ambush against the horde.
        • Daniel 6:10 – When he found out He would be thrown into the lion’s den, Daniel thanked God.
        • Psalm 40; Psalm 69 – David thanks God and praises Him in song over and over again in the book of Psalms.
        • Joshua 5 – Israel’s priests and trumpets lead the army around Jericho before the walls crumble.
        • The Passover meal itself (instituted by God) is a thanksgiving remembrance of what God has done and who He is intended to give His people strength and reassurance in all their circumstances.

Thanksgiving/gratitude are also good for us ‘because they reframe our thoughts about our circumstances. When I spend time reflecting on all my blessings, the things God has done for me, the things He has given me, I enter life with a willingness to give and to be a blessing to others. On the other hand, when I’m not mindful of my blessings, I’m more likely to fall into the trap of comparing myself to others. In those moments I feel inadequate and sometimes even cheated. I enter life looking for what I can get out of the situation or what I can take for myself. Gratitude allows me to see the truth that in Christ I am “more than a conqueror” and He is “all that I need.”

Ann Voskamp has done some studies in conjunction with her book, “1,000 Gifts.” She asked people to write down 3 things they are grateful for each day for a year. In the end, they will have collected a list of over 1,000 gifts. Her theory is that this practice changes our outlook, our attitudes, our choices. . . in short, it changes our lives. Here’s a quote:

“If they wrote down just three things a day they were grateful for, they were less depressed, less suicidal, less apathetic, than those who didn’t practice lifestyle gratitude. . . . Research indicated that recording those blessings was cognitive training, a way of reorganizing your brain to focus on goodness. It increases an individual’s positive focus by 25%. . . . Those who practice this type of lifestyle gratitude have higher levels of alertness, enthusiasm, optimism, attentiveness, energy, they were more motivated, likeable, other-oriented, forgiving, generous, helpful, more likely to volunteer, and more likely to give back. Giving thanks and giving back are ‘Siamese twins.’ They move as one.” – Ann Voskamp

Here’s a link to download a sermon I preached on this topic:

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The Sword of Gratitude

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Reclaimed Wood – Reclaimed Hearts

Reclaimed Wood Fireplace at my House

I clutch the head tightly with the claw and strain to pry the nail out of the flesh leaving an open wound. Sometimes it splinters even more. The bent nails must be hammered from the opposite side in order to be removed. Reclaimed wood is rough, marred, scarred, scratched, discolored, beaten, and weathered. It’s not very pretty. However, when used in the right context, it can be beautiful. The scars give it character and tell a story. It has rich history. The wood cannot reclaim itself. I must do the work.

My heart is the same. God has been reclaiming my heart piece by piece since the day I chose to follow Him back in 1985. Like the nails that must be hammered from the opposite side, He works from the inside out. It’s a painful process. He is hammering, ripping, tearing, and prying out the damage that I’ve done to myself with my sin. It hurts. It’s not an easy process and sometimes I recognize new splinters in the painful ways that my sin had affected me without my knowledge. The Holy Spirit convicts me and He opens wounds within me, but then Jesus offers healing and has already provided the salve by covering my sin with His own blood.

Like the wood, I am rough, marred, scarred, scratched, discolored, beaten, and weathered. However, when I submit and let God put me in the right context, I become beautiful. I cannot do this on my own, but in His hands, I have character, a story, and a rich history that He can use for His glory. I become His creation as He molds me into His likeness in spite of my sin and in spite of my wounds. I am His and that makes all the difference.