Category: Life Lessons

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Chisels for Priorities

This is the first message I shared at Brazos Pointe Fellowship. The series was Chisels: Scriptures that God has used to shape us. I chose the Gibeonite story from Joshua 9 because it shows clearly how the enemy can use good things over time to take territory from the Lord in our hearts.   

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My son Kasen is a Jr at Brazoswood now, but he gave me permission to tell you about when he was 6. From early on He was very physical and sports came easy to him. He rode a bike without training wheels the same week that he turned 3. He was always one of the best athletes in every sport he played. However, when He tried out for the swim team at 6, it all changed. To make the team, he was supposed to swim across the pool with a “recognizable stroke.” He jumped confidently into the pool and . . . well . . . let’s just say it was not very “recognizable.” OK, It was bad, but it was fine with me. I didn’t really want to give up all our Saturdays for swim meets. If he made the team, it would have been great, but if he didn’t make the team, it still would have been great.

I didn’t really care, but Kasen was ready to quit. He wasn’t the best swimmer in the pool and it was hard, so he was discouraged and he was just done. In that moment however, something changed in me. I didn’t want a kid who quit anytime something was difficult. I didn’t care about the team, but I cared about my son and I knew this was a teachable moment – a formative moment. I wanted him to learn how to work for something – how to have a little grit. He agreed to practice every day for the next two weeks and when he tried out again, he killed it. He joined the team and then went on to so much more. He went to the State swim meet that same year. He currently holds the state record for 8 and under backstroke, and even got gold medals at a National swim meet a few years later.

More importantly, he knows how to work for something. He doesn’t quit when things are tough. He has grit. This summer, he is actually working as a swim coach on that same team.

Swim has been a good thing for our family. It has been one of the tools God has used for shaping us, and we are grateful for it. I couldn’t let Kasen quit, ‘cause I recognized how that moment could shape him and be important to his future. And it has been.

As the new Discipleship Minister at my church writing about chisels and spiritual formation . . . man this is like music to my ears! This is what my job is all about. And I think it’s important to remember that we are being formed, shaped, molded, and changed all the time. Something is formed in us every day – both good and bad. If I had let Kasen quit that day, it would have formed something in him too – just not the formation that I, as his father would have chosen for him.

We can’t avoid change. Spiritual formation is guaranteed. We will be formed. The question is not if we are being formed, it’s who has the chisel in hand. While God works to make us more like Him, this world aims to chisel away and distort the image of God within us. God wants one thing, the world tears it apart. God will win that battle every day that we abide in Him and give Him the space to work.

On the other hand, if we place our lives in the hands of the world, if we are apathetic about it, or even if we aren’t intentional, we are putting ourselves in danger of being formed into something other than God’s highest and best. This is where it gets tough though. I mean, this moment with Kasen was obvious to me. It was easy to see with his reaction to just give up. It was a clear moment that he could learn something. I saw the moment and I responded well (which I don’t always do.) But it’s not always so simple and easy. These moments can be tough to spot.  Sometimes they aren’t so obvious. Sometimes they’re subtle. Sometimes I miss it. I don’t recognize all the ways I’m being shaped. There are things that creep into our lives. Subtle things. Things that are good things. Things that gradually, bit by bit, grab tiny pieces of our hearts. And if they get too many of those pieces, they can begin to control us. In this way, these good things can become like little “g” gods without us even realizing how it happened. Good things that become like gods are bad things.

I’m going to share a story from the Old Testament today, that I believe is a similar situation. It’s a story about a formational moment that God saw for his children. You see, for 400 years, His chosen people in the Old Testament, the Israelites, had been shaped and forged into slaves in Egypt. God saw them there, as they were, and loved them, but He wanted more for them. He wanted them to represent Him to the entire world, so He miraculously rescued them from slavery and had a plan to bring them into a new land for a new start. Unfortunately, with their slave mentality, they weren’t going to represent Him very well.

God needed to form them and shape them to look more like Himself. (That’s the point for us too.) All of this meant they had to be holy – set apart and spiritually pure. So God had to keep them to Himself. He had to be their only influence. He had to keep them away from distractions or anything that might hinder their holiness. So as they entered the new promised land, God told them not to make any treaties with the people that occupied the land. He even told them to destroy them. . . Destroy the kings and idols that they find in the land. Destroy the distractions.

By the way, this is still God’s desire: You and I are still called to destroy the kings & idols that are found in our hearts.

Destroy the distractions that hinder our holiness.

Now, let’s think a minute about these distractions – the kings they were to destroy. What is a king? Kings hold authority over a specific location or people. They are sovereign within a certain territory and hold power over its’ people. God tells Joshua, (He’s the leader of God’s people at this time.) God tells him to remove all the kings in the land and to destroy them because God Himself would be the only King. He alone is King. He alone is in control. He will not share His authority. If they were going to represent Him to the world, He had to be first place in their lives.

An English writer from the 1800s named John Ruskin says,

“God will put up with a great many things in the human heart, but there is one thing that He will not put up with in it – a second place. He who offers God a second place, offers Him no place.”

As Christ followers, we must remove all the kings and idols that once occupied territory in our hearts.” We must clear the land and offer our hearts to Jesus, the one and only King and then continue to protect and defend God’s territory.

Our church uses a resource called, “Rooted” for small groups. Week 5 is the “strongholds” week. The whole evening is focused on some of the obvious kings that need to be removed from our hearts. Things like fear, pride, bitterness, control, despair, sexual immorality, insecurity, deceit. . . These are clear and easy to spot. As he entered the promised land, Joshua had won battles against some obvious enemies like this at Jericho and Ai. They were strongholds. They were obvious enemies. They were hard to miss.

But the ones I want to talk through today are less obvious. They’re subtle enemies. They are kings that pretend to be friends. These subtle kings are much harder to spot.

Before reading he Scripture below, remember that God is forming His people under the leadership of Joshua. They are former slaves who need to become holy so they can represent God Himself. God has told them to destroy the Kings and idols in the land. At this point in the story, they have done well. Joshua has listened and obeyed God at every turn. They have defeated both Jericho and the city of Ai in some miraculous and incredible ways. Joshua and the people are in a good place when all this goes down. 

Joshua 9: 1 Now when all the kings west of the Jordan heard about these things . . . 2 they came together to wage war against Joshua and Israel. 3 However, when the people of Gibeon (who also live in the Promised land) heard what Joshua had done to Jericho and Ai, 4 they resorted to a ruse: (They disguised themselves) They went as a delegation whose donkeys were loaded with worn-out sacks and old wineskins, cracked and mended. 5 They put worn and patched sandals on their feet and wore old clothes. All the bread of their food supply was dry and moldy. 6 Then they went to Joshua in the camp at Gilgal and said to him and the Israelites, “We have come from a distant country; make a treaty with us.”

7 The Israelites said to the Hivites, “But perhaps you live near us, so how can we make a treaty with you?”

(remember: God said no treaties)

8 “We are your servants,” they said to Joshua. (These are lies. They really want Joshua to serve them.)

But Joshua asked, “Who are you and where do you come from?”

9 They answered: “Your servants have come from a very distant country because of the fame of the Lord your God. For we have heard reports of him: all that he did in Egypt, 10 and all that he did to the two kings of the Amorites east of the Jordan—11 And our elders and all those living in our country said to us, ‘Take provisions for your journey; go and meet them and say to them, “We are your servants; make a treaty with us.”’ 12 This bread of ours was warm when we packed it at home on the day we left to come to you. But now see how dry and moldy it is. 13 And these wineskins that we filled were new, but see how cracked they are. And our clothes and sandals are worn out by the very long journey.”

14 The Israelites sampled their provisions but did not inquire of the Lord. 15 Then Joshua made a treaty of peace with them to let them live, and the leaders of the assembly ratified it by oath.

Wait!?! What?!?! Joshua is a Bible hero. He’s not supposed to do this. He’s supposed to do it right and be our example. Yes . . . but he was deceived. He was tricked. The Gibeonites weren’t obvious kings. They were subtle kings. They deceived Joshua by pretending to be from another land.

Did you notice how he messed up? Where he made his mistake? Did you catch it? Look at vs 14.

Joshua did NOT inquire of the LORD.

Joshua undermined the whole thing by just powering through on his own. The Lord had given him success in two huge victories. He was confident. He was on a winning streak. He thought he was in control. He relied on himself.  He relied on himself.

Alright. So. . . let’s get personal here.

What are the deceptive kings in your life?

Who are your Gibeonites? What is fighting for more territory in your life? If you’re a Christ follower, then Jesus is the one and only King over it all. It’s all His territory. What kings have tricked you? What relationships or habits or activities have crept into your life and consume you? These aren’t “bad” things. They might even be good. These aren’t obvious kings. These are Gibeonites – the subtle deceivers.

I’ve got more of these than I care to admit, but I’m gonna tell you about one.

Actually, in some ways I’ve already told you about it. My story about Kasen and the swim team is where it all started. Over the years, that amazing formational moment with swim has grown into a Gibeonite king. Today, that king goes by another name though: Waterpolo.

Don’t get me wrong. We love waterpolo and the community of people that we have become a part of is amazing. It’s just that it’s not always a great and Godly endeavor either. Both school and club waterpolo have occupied territory in our lives that was once the Lord’s.

We have missed worship services for tournaments. We have spent money on hotels, food, gas, and fees, for tournaments, and practices, and waterpolo experiences. That money could have been used for eternal/kingdom purposes. We have spent emotional energy, shed tears, and been angry over waterpolo drama – not to mention when a ref makes a bad call. I will jump out of my seat screaming and waving my arms around like a fool. I can get caught up in the moment and completely lose control of myself. Just last season, I found myself yelling at a ref so obnoxiously that from the deck of the pool, he yelled back into the stands at me saying, “You think you’re a better ref?” Then he pulled out a little notebook to tell me what dates I could come to referee training. But, it didn’t slow me down. I just kept yelling. When the game was over, a friend said, “You know it’s a bad call when the guy wearing that shirt is screaming.” I looked down at my shirt. It said, “Be Kind” in big bold letters. I felt really small. I didn’t exactly reflect Jesus to that ref. I am a walking contradiction.

Anyway, a bad call is like the fast track for anger to become my king. Anything that can do the things that waterpolo can do to me, probably occupies more of my heart than I really even know.

To be clear, waterpolo is not all bad. There are great and Godly things that have happened too. God has used waterpolo to form us into His image.  We’ve had spiritual conversations with people who aren’t church people and we’ve been able to be a steady and consistent witness with many people in that community.

What I am saying is this: We’ve been on both sides of the line between what glorifies God and what doesn’t.

My guess is that this has happened to you too. It’s probably not waterpolo, but there’s some sort of Gibeonite in your life too. Maybe it’s another sport, or a relationship, maybe social media, or a habit, or something that has become an addiction. I don’t know, but whatever it is, it’s a subtle slope. Slow and seemingly unpredictable.

My family was shaped by a series of tiny decisions. When we started, there were no games on Sundays. However, as my kids got older, schedules got more demanding and one Sunday, we said, “The team is counting on us. We can’t let them down. It’s just one week. Our kids are still connected to the body of Christ.” We justified it. Each decision was small enough that it was easy to write it off.

Like Joshua, we were deceived and like Joshua, I didn’t “inquire of the Lord.” I thought I didn’t need His help ‘cause it seemed like such a small decision. I relied on myself. 

Author, Mark Lawrence says,

There’s a slope towards evil, a gentle gradient that can be ignored at each step, unfelt. It’s not until you look back, see the distant heights where you once lived, that you understand your journey. (from Emperor of Thorns)

That’s where I’m at right now. I’m looking back where we’ve come from and where this path is headed. This is my fault. I can see it clearly now and I’ve got to do something different.

So where do I go from here? How do I fix it? Do I tell my kids it’s over. We’re done with waterpolo? Do we kick waterpolo out of our lives? Sometimes, I think that is the answer, but this time, I don’t think it’s that simple. I think it’s more complicated and nuanced than that. It’s too nuanced for me, so let’s go back to Joshua. What did he do?

After he figured out how he had been deceived: That very same day.

Joshua 9:27 “That day he made the Gibeonites woodcutters and water carriers for the assembly, to provide for the need of the altar of the Lord.”

Do you see it? He didn’t go back on his word. He didn’t break his treaty. He didn’t kick them out. Instead, Joshua made them servants of the Lord. It’s genius really. 

He put God back in His rightful place as King. He put the Lord over the Gibeonites!

I think that’s my answer. I think it’s your answer – the answer for all of us. No matter if your Gibeonite is waterpolo, or social media, an addiction, a relationship, or whatever.

Man, we gotta put God back on the throne. We gotta make Him King over it all. He deserves to sit in His rightful place, which is never 2nd place. In the ways your Gibeonite serves Him, you’re good. In the ways that it doesn’t, well. . . those are tougher decisions, but they are decisions that we know the answers to. They’re just decisions that we don’t like. We’ve got to repent and turn back to God. The issue here is more about having the courage to make the right decision. How will we choose to be shaped in those moments?

Will you choose the chisel in God’s hand or the one in the hand of your Gibeonite?

Here’s what I know. We’ve got to do something different. We can’t just keep doing what we’ve been doing. We’ve got to be intentional. Like my son Kasen, it’s gonna take hard work and grit. When God swings the hammer at His chisel, it will be painful. It hurts to cut these things out of our lives, but they will be worth it. We will look more like him as we create new practices and habits so our reflex is to make Jesus King.

There are things we can learn from Joshua’s mistake. We must:

  • Be Wise: Inquire of the Lord. Don’t be deceived.
  • Be Ready: Refuse to rely on yourself.
  • Prioritize: Make Jesus King over everything – especially your Gibeonites.

This is our church core value: Jesus over Everything. Right?

By the way, I should finish the story. In the next chapter, the Gibeonites call upon Joshua to protect them. Who do they think they are? They want him to serve them because of a treaty they tricked him into. Joshua doesn’t abandon them. (which is what I would have been tempted to do thinking now they’ll get what they deserve now) Instead, Joshua comes with his whole army and defends the very people who deceived him. That’s crazy to me. But Joshua did what Jesus would do years later.

As the true King, Jesus rescues you in spite of your sin. Even if you come to Him pretending you’re someone else, He forgives you and saves you and protects you. He isn’t fooled. He knows every part of you and still makes an irrevocable treaty with you. Are you hearing me? He knows every part of you and still makes a treaty with you. This treaty is authorized by His work on the cross and it’s signed in blood. It’s an everlasting treaty and it gives you full rights as a child of the King. The King who will rule and reign forever. If you invite other Gibeonites into His territory, He will subdue them. In Him, there is only victory. Let Him be King of your heart and your life. It’s the best decision you’ll ever make. Jesus is King! Jesus is King! Jesus is King!

Prayer:

Dear God, We thank You and praise You that You are King. You rule and reign over everything. The heavens and earth declare Your glory. The planets were formed and move around their orbits at Your command. The wind and the waves, they listen to You. All of creation responds to You with a resounding, “Yes!” And yet Lord, when I look at my own heart, full of kings and idols, hardened and distracted. I have the audacity to tell You “No.” Lord, forgive me. Turn me from these ways, back to You. Teach me to inquire of You at every turn. Give me courage to choose the chisel in You hand. Send Your Spirit to lead me to destroy the distractions so that I might be holy and represent You well. Lord, You are King over everything. Today, may You be king over my heart too. AMEN. 

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Esther was Trafficked

Esther was Trafficked!

Esther is remembered for standing up to a foreign king on behalf of her people. She is regarded as a hero and rightfully so, but most of the time that her story is told, we skip over the fact that she was trafficked. Think about it. Originally, Esther was a humble little girl who was mistreated and forcefully placed into an environment where she would be trafficked for the pleasure of a powerful man, the king.

Let’s go back and consider this part of her story a little more. It actually starts with a decision by Queen Vashti.

Esther Chapter 1 describes a 180 day feast hosted by King Xerxes for all his nobles, governors, officials, and servants to display his greatness.

Does it really take 6 months of partying to demonstrate your power or is this guy a little self-centered? Or maybe he’s using this feast to compensate for some sort of insecurity?

Anyway, a 6 month party is pretty extravagant. After this party, he throws another 7 day party for all the people in the city. It’s a high-brow affair with very over-the-top food, drink, décor, golden vessels, couches, marble, and all the finery. The wine was being distributed freely without any restrictions on anyone. It was an open bar for everyone.

It most likely devolved into a drunken brawl rather quickly – a week long tailgate.

Queen Vashti (Xerxes’ wife) had a smaller feast for the women in the palace during this time too, but she was interrupted on the 7th day by a request from her husband. He was “merry with wine” and wanted her to come to his “feast” wearing her crown so all his drunken “friends” could see her “beauty.”

This sounds like an insecure man to me again – drunk and insecure so he had to bring her in so others could gawk at her and be “impressed” that he had such an incredible woman.

There’s something else you miss here if you don’t study the culture. You see, the custom of the day invited wives to these banquets too, until the time when the men began to get drunk, and at that time the “dancers” would come in to “entertain” them. Wives typically left the banquet when the “dancers” arrived. When Xerxes asked her to come to the banquet, it seems obvious that she had already left the party. Most likely the men were already drunk and the “dancers” were busy “entertaining.” Also, when Xerxes asks her to come wearing her “royal crown,” most Biblical scholars understand this to mean that he was asking her to appear before them all wearing ONLY her crown. Xerxes was asking her to appear naked in front of a bunch of drunk men who were in a party environment where they were free to touch and play with all the other women “dancers.” She knew her husband. He was insecure and was just trying to show her off in front of these other men. She understood the danger that she would be putting herself in. He is equating her with the “dancers.” At this point, he is no longer treating her as his “wife.”

Queen Vashti refuses his invitation. I mean, it’s no wonder she refused. What self-respecting woman would have appeared? Right? When she refuses to join him, she is actually risking her life. King Xerxes, of course, is angry and so he goes to his “yes” men to have his ears tickled and get the emotional support that he needed. Again, we see his insecurity playing out in these behaviors. They basically say, “Forget her. Let’s go find you ‘the most beautiful girl in the world.’” Queen Vashti is banished from the kingdom and Esther Chapter 2 begins with a description of the process of the search to find a replacement wife for King Xerxes.

Now, Esther was a young woman who lived with her older cousin Mordecai because she had lost both of her parents. He loved her “as his own daughter.” When Xerxes’ order was proclaimed, she “was taken” into the custody of the man in charge of the harem. She was forced out of her home. In time, Esther impressed him and won the favored position among the girls. During her preparation time in the palace, Mordecai walked around the courtyard so he could keep his eye on her. He truly thought of her as a daughter and was concerned for her safety and well-being. He had warned her not to let the king know about her lowly Jewish heritage.

It must have horrified him to imagine the things she would have endured and the abuse that awaited her as one of the girls in the king’s harem. As her adopted father, it must have pained him greatly knowing that there wasn’t really anything he could do to get her out of this awful situation. In spite of the way this is often taught, this was no beauty pageant with a scholarship and glamorous travel schedule awaiting. In reality, it was a series of events that started with a forced removal from their homes and ended in sexual assault. These girls were taken away from their families and homes, isolated from the relationships that rooted them, denied the practice of their faith/beliefs, pressured into changing their appearances and mannerisms, stripped of any self-expression so they could conform to the whims of another, and they were eventually sexually assaulted with no other intention than to pleasure the king until he had chosen a bride. Esther wasn’t a pageant girl. She was an innocent young woman who was forced into sexual submission by her circumstances and a king with an inferiority complex and low self-esteem. He was using her to fill his own emptiness and desires. Esther was trafficked. And there were countless others who not only allowed it to happen, but encouraged it and aided in the process.

After abusing Esther as well as many other young women, King Xerxes eventually chooses her to take the place of Vashti and be his wife. From our vantage point it may appear that there were some privileges and advantages to the title of Queen, but that’s what a trafficker does. He makes “the life” appear to be a great opportunity. The reality however, is that none of those things could give back her innocence. None of those things could heal the trauma or fill the void left by the abuse that she had endured. She may have had the title of Queen, but she was damaged, hurt, and broken by this forced relationship and the constant suffering of the continued abuse.

However, as the book continues and the story develops, we find Esther to be a wonderful example of a woman of faith. In the midst of her circumstances and her abuse, God was with her. She may have been damaged, but as one of God’s chosen people, she still found her identity in the Lord. When a plot to kill the Israelites (her people) is revealed, she risks her own life and goes before the King to save her people. There are at least 5 risks she took.

  1. Initiating a conversation with the King broke the law and could result in death.
  2. In order to make her request, she had to reveal that she was a Jew.
  3. Laws were irreversible in the Persian Empire.
  4. Haman was 2nd most powerful man on the earth.
  5. Esther had to be extremely gentle and careful with her speech because the King had so many insecurities. It’s difficult to get someone to change their mind without offending their pride.

In spite of her lowly heritage, Esther uses her position of influence and her relationship with the king, to stand up to him, and save her people. Rather than asserting power and making demands, Esther works behind the scenes relationally to influence and lead the people around her. It is her quiet strength that influences the evil king.

Esther and Vashti are both women to be admired. Both stood up to injustice.

Vashti represents one way of handling the evil requests of ungodly men. She starts from a position of power and stood for what she believed was right, but she also had to be willing to sacrifice her power/position to make her stance.

Esther represents another way. She starts in a humble position and plays along working behind the scenes to build an influential relationship. Out of this relationship, she stands up for what she believes is right as well.

Both women are guided by their conscience. Esther is empowered by her faith.

Now let’s be clear: In spite of how this passage is sometimes taught. God did NOT put Esther in this situation. It was NOT God’s intention for her to be trafficked. Human sin, and specifically King Xerxes and his men are the abusers/traffickers here. God however, is able to reach into any and every situation and rescue us or use us for His glory and His purposes. As Genesis 50:20 describes, “What man meant for evil, God meant for good.” When we experience evil, we must recognize that God can turn it around and make good of it. As a loving father and one who is all powerful, He is able, and He is willing.

What does this mean for us? How should we respond? I’d encourage you to ask yourself several questions:

Like Vashti, is there some evil that you need to stand up against or a wrong you could make right? Are you willing to pay the price of your own reputation, wealth, or social standing to do the right thing?

Like Esther, what kind of influence do you have with the people who surround you? Is there someone who could serve as a Mordecai for you who encourages and supports you through your difficult circumstance? Do the people around you notice your Godly demeanor? In what ways do you stand out from everyone else? Is Jesus’ name lifted up? Are people encouraged? Are people being treated well or even rescued/saved due to your influence? Is there a way God could use you in a difficult situation? Is He calling you to be involved in His work?

Esther was trafficked, but you and I have been too. God created you, but sin has coerced and convinced us that it has a better way. Its intent is to enslave us where we will be used and abused for the sake of its own glory and satisfaction. The world wants to use and abuse us for its own purposes. It seeks to isolate us from those who truly care for us so it can have us all to itself. Sin “crouches at the door and desires to have us.” (Gen 4:7) It will use us and destroy us just as Xerxes did to Esther. Like her, we have been trafficked.

There’s good news though. In the midst of her enslavement, God made a way for her people to be saved. Esther suffered through all kinds of abuse, but eventually God used her to save His people. In the midst of our enslavement, God has made a way for us to be saved too. Jesus’ blood on the cross is evidence of the suffering He endured, but through this suffering, God has provided a way for us to be rescued as well. Jesus is our rescuer. He is our Savior.

Esther was trafficked.

You have been trafficked.

Esther was used by God to save others.

Will you allow God to use you?

 

PS – If you’d like more information about Human Trafficking, check out  Refuge for Women .

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A Dragon in My Nativity

Thank you to Sarah Manning who first shared these ideas with a women’s group from our church. (Grace Bible Church, Clute TX) Here’s a pic from my house a few years ago. My daughter, Kesleigh (now a 7th grader) decided that she wanted a smurf in our nativity. He sorta looks like a shepherd right?!?! Over the years we’ve had lots of different characters join our nativity – Lightning McQueen, Larry the Cucumber. . . you name it.  I guess the truth is we all have some unwanted guests in our nativitys. They might be people, but grief could be an unwanted guest too, or disappointment, or feelings of inadequacy. Are there some people or circumstances this year that just “aren’t right?” Christmas can be hard – really hard. Maybe you’ve lost someone and Christmas is just gonna be hard. Maybe you’ve been forced to rethink your finances and you can’t do Christmas the way you’d like to. Maybe you’ve got crazy people in your family and getting together just isn’t enjoyable anymore. Whatever it is: You’ve got a dragon in your nativity.  Yes – I said a dragon – big and overbearing, disgusting. Maybe your dragon spews fire with its’ words, or lurks around the season looking for the moment to break in and destroy something. Or maybe he quietly torments your innermost thoughts.

Dragons. We’ve all got ‘em. I’ve got a dragon in my nativity too. This year will be one of the first Christmas’s since my brother passed away. We’re going to have some tough moments and there’s no question that my sister is gonna cry over it at some point.  There’s a dragon in my nativity too. He doesn’t belong. He seeks to destroy our celebration and ruin the whole thing. He will sneak into our celebration to try to have his way with us.

But here’s the thing. Maybe you never knew it, but there’s a dragon in the real nativity too. Revelation 12:1-6 describes a pregnant woman who is about to give birth when a dragon appears and waits so he can “devour the baby the moment he is born.” The dragon stands there ready and waiting to bring destruction. However, the child is saved and then the woman goes into the wilderness.

This is the Bethlehem story. Herod is the dragon. He plots with the wisemen so he can discover where Jesus is and go kill him. When the wisemen don’t fall for his scheme, he decides to kill all the babies under the age of 2, but God warns Mary and Joseph and they flee to the wilderness of Egypt for a while.

There was a dragon in the first nativity. His name was Herod.

There are dragons lurking around the corner throughout all of Scripture: (throughout all of our lives too)

The dragon in the Moses story is the Pharaoh who tries to kill all the Jewish babies. Of course God makes a way for Moses to live and eventually rescue the people.

In the garden of Eden, the snake tempts the woman and seeks to bring destruction upon she and Adam. (Which by the way, Genesis 3 says the woman’s offspring will destroy the serpent.)

In the other garden where Jesus prays the dragon reveals himself as Roman soldiers who arrest Jesus and begin the process which would lead to His death on the cross.

GK Chesterton wrote, “Fairy Tales do not tell children that dragons exist. Children already know that dragons exist. Fairy tales tell children that dragons can be killed.”

I’m going to steal his quote and change it, but here’s what I believe.

“The Bible doesn’t tell people that dragons exist. People already know dragons exist. The Bible’s intent is to tell us the dragons have already been defeated.”

You have a dragon in your classroom. It’s exactly the same dragon that’s in my classroom. And by the way, it’s not the kid that popped into your mind. The dragon is the fear, sin, death, and destruction that surround that kid. It’s the evil that influences him and the evil that he allows to control him like a puppet.

The true dragon slayer doesn’t destroy people. He captures hearts and works diligently and sacrificially to destroy the fear, sin, death, and destruction that influence and them. During the worst possible situation, on the cross, enduring unimaginable torment, Jesus isn’t angry with his captors. He actually says “Forgive them, for they know not what they do.”

Jesus’ attitude in that moment is compassion. He doesn’t actually do it, but when I reflect on this whole thing, I hear “Capturing Kids Hearts” questions with Jesus saying, “What are you doing? What are you supposed to be doing?” It’s a compassionate response, but forces our students to own their behaviors.

The point is, Jesus doesn’t destroy the people who are trying to destroy Him. Let’s be clear. He could have destroyed them with just a word, but the people aren’t the dragon. The true dragon was Jesus’ objective. The dragon is the fear, sin, death, and destruction that controlled those people. The people are just puppets under the influence of the dragon.

And here is the good news!! If you go back to that passage in Revelation, you see it too. The people triumph over the dragon, “by the blood of the lamb.” Yes! We win!! Jesus, our knight in shining armor, withdrew His sword (which according to Heb 4:12 is the Word of God) and conquered the dragon. On the cross He stepped into death and then walks out of the tomb defeating the dragon. The power of fear, sin, death, and destruction had no hold on Him. And when we walk in faith, it has no hold on us either.

Yes – there is a dragon in my nativity, and in my house, and my classroom, and everywhere I go, BUT there is also a dragon slayer named Jesus who was born, and lived to destroy that dragon. And now by faith, the dragon slayer lives in me, and you, and all of those who call on His name.

Whatever dragon you encounter this season and whatever power it holds on you, remember that you have a greater power, a dragon slayer. He is just a prayer away. He has already defeated your dragon and empowers you with a sword of your own – the Word of God.

Romans 8:37 “We are more than conquerors, through Him who loved us.”

AMEN.

 

Here’s a great video that goes with this message too:

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Arrows – Be Brave

Steve’s Word:
I am very blessed to have my children. God has shown immense and undeserved favor to me in bringing my kids into my life. I feel humble and inadequate for the task of raising them to know Him and to bring Him glory, but by His grace, empowered by His Spirit, I will. Notice, I did not say “try.” Yoda says, “Do or do not. There is no try.” And that is very appropriate here. “Trying” is not good enough in this monumental endeavor. It’s not enough to “try” to raise them as God has called. I must “do.”


God’s Word: 
Psalm 127:4 – Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one’s youth. Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them.

Steve’s Word:
According to this verse, my kids are my arrows, but what does that mean? What do arrows do? Answer: They are launched into the world by the archer (the Father) in order to advance His army into enemy territories. It is my prayer that their young lives will be spent “becoming” arrows and that as they grow, they will be launched into the world to “take ground” from the enemy so that God’s army can be advanced. The arrow’s purpose is to help Him with His purposes for His Kingdom and His glory. Arrows also go into dangerous places – enemy territory. They take risks for a greater purpose and penetrate the darkness with light. Arrows are aimed at specific targets, not just thrown out randomly. The archer “plans” his shot. God is a skilled archer, He has a plan and is able to place you in the exact place He needs you to be.

My children are the only arrows I have and I pray that they will be all of these things. It will take bravery, but they are children of God who I pray will be empowered by the Spirit of God when one day they choose to honor Him and give Him their lives.

God’s Word:
Romans 8:31b – If God is for us, who can be against us?

Psalm 45:5 – Your arrows are sharp in the heart of the king’s enemies; the peoples fall under you.

Famous Words:
“With God, you are stronger than your struggles and more fierce than your fears. God provides comfort and strength to those who trust in Him. Be encouraged, keep standing, and know that everything’s going to be alright.” – Germany Kent

“Playing it safe is risky. The greatest risk is taking no risks.” – Mark Batterson

“You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.” – Khalil Gibran

“Life is like an arrow. The farther back you are pulled, the farther forward you will end up.” – Unknown

“A single arrow is easily broken; a quiver of ten is not.” – Japanese proverb

“Jesus didn’t die to make us safe, but to make us dangerous.” – Mark Batterson

“You must not only aim right, but draw the bow with all your might.” – Henry David Thoreau

“Courage is contagious. When a brave man takes a stand, the spines of others are often stiffened.” – Billy Graham

Personal Story:
I haven’t had the pleasure of launching my children out into the world just yet, so the only story I can tell is about some of my students from when I was in youth ministry. One of my greatest joys is watching my ex-students who have grown up and continued to follow Jesus into their adult lives. I have old students who have done mission work all over the world. Off the top of my head I can think of students who have served in Egypt, Dominican Republic, Costa Rica, Liberia, Scotland, South Africa, China, and Thailand. I have also been able to download sermon podcasts from some of my old students who are pastors. Others have been involved in youth ministry, music ministry, church planting, and other local church ministries. I can think of at least 15 of my ex-students who have served in ministry in a full-time role. There are countless others who are serving in other ways. I even have connections with a couple of my old students who are living out their faith in Hollywood. One is in the modeling/acting world and another is a musician. Both travel all over the world regularly and share their faith in each of those places.

One of my favorite things is when there is some sort of event that brings these people back together. A couple years ago, we got to attend a retirement party for our friend Jon Godbold and we had the chance to see and catch up with a lot of those students. It’s truly a joy for me to watch how they are serving the Lord and to know that God was working among us during our times together to lead them to those places. If that’s how I feel about ex-students, I can’t imagine how great it will be to watch my own children grow into the people that God has planned for them to be. I’m excited to watch as they are launched into the world and take ground for His kingdom. As the verse says, I am blessed to have some arrows in my quiver.

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Gratitude, Hope, and Hospitals

Today my brother, Roger has travelled down to Lake Jackson by himself to visit us. (We’ve been in this house for close to 15 years and this is his first time to see it.) I’m grateful for the time we spent going to church, watching football, going out to eat, and just hanging out. He is not out of the woods yet, but he has come a long way. Today, he a different man than he was just a few months ago. He has a renewed faith. We are able to carry on great conversations.

Today, I’m grateful. I’m grateful for my brother. I’m grateful for our new relationship. I’m grateful for his effort to come down to see us. I’m grateful to God for progress and for hope.  Today, I praise God for all He has done and for His promise to be with us through all of our circumstances.

Matthew 28:20b – (Jesus speaking) – I am with you always, even to the end of the age.

1 Corinthians 13:7 – [Love] always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Romans 5:3-4 –  . . . we also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope; and hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us.

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Reclaimed Wood – Reclaimed Hearts

Reclaimed Wood Fireplace at my House

I clutch the head tightly with the claw and strain to pry the nail out of the flesh leaving an open wound. Sometimes it splinters even more. The bent nails must be hammered from the opposite side in order to be removed. Reclaimed wood is rough, marred, scarred, scratched, discolored, beaten, and weathered. It’s not very pretty. However, when used in the right context, it can be beautiful. The scars give it character and tell a story. It has rich history. The wood cannot reclaim itself. I must do the work.

My heart is the same. God has been reclaiming my heart piece by piece since the day I chose to follow Him back in 1985. Like the nails that must be hammered from the opposite side, He works from the inside out. It’s a painful process. He is hammering, ripping, tearing, and prying out the damage that I’ve done to myself with my sin. It hurts. It’s not an easy process and sometimes I recognize new splinters in the painful ways that my sin had affected me without my knowledge. The Holy Spirit convicts me and He opens wounds within me, but then Jesus offers healing and has already provided the salve by covering my sin with His own blood.

Like the wood, I am rough, marred, scarred, scratched, discolored, beaten, and weathered. However, when I submit and let God put me in the right context, I become beautiful. I cannot do this on my own, but in His hands, I have character, a story, and a rich history that He can use for His glory. I become His creation as He molds me into His likeness in spite of my sin and in spite of my wounds. I am His and that makes all the difference.

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He died. I sighed.

(written in Dec 2014)

It’s a week before Christmas. There’s lots to do. I’ve been working all week and finally get to come home. I’m so ready for the holidays away from students – away from work. I’m tired. As I drive home, I start to get excited about being home, being with my kids, having good family time.

I walk through the door and notice the lights are off. My bride is asleep on the couch and my kids are snuggled up beside her watching Mr Bean. They start talking to me and it disrupts Miranda’s sleep. I “shhh” them, but it doesn’t last long. I can tell they’re going to be talkative now that I’m here, so I get up and gently help Miranda to her feet and walk her to bed so the kids can be themselves without disrupting her.

I spend the next hour with kids bouncing up and down on top of me while we watch more Mr Bean. I try to relax and read a little, but the kids keep interrupting. I know it’s important to listen to Kesleigh telling me which coloring book picture is her favorite, but I really just wanna rest. I need a little “cave” time. When Miranda gets up, she sighs and says she wishes I could have gotten Kasen a haircut before we go see Santa tonight. She hasn’t been very subtle with her hints at taking him for a haircut for the past 2 weeks. I even took him one night earlier this week, but the wait was too long. I also remember that she had asked me to go to Best Buy to check on getting a phone for my mom, so I decide to try and get these things done before the 5 o’clock crowd is off work. Kasen and I leave right away, but when we arrive, we’ve still got an hour wait. I go to Best Buy and get the information we needed and then return to Supercuts. We timed it well, ’cause they called Kasen’s name from the hour long list just a few minutes after we arrive.

By the time we’re done, it’s time to meet Miranda and Kesleigh at the mall for dinner and Santa pics. We have a great time and the wait for Santa wasn’t bad. After that, we go driving around town to look at Christmas lights and stop to get the kids a McDonalds shake and then head to BrewNBake for hot chocolate for Miranda and I. The kids are getting restless in the car. They were downright annoying in BrewNBake and continued to be that way once we arrived home. I try to watch a tv show to unwind a bit, but I find myself hitting pause on the remote ’cause I can’t hear. Arguments over who is gonna take a bath first and whining about not being able to find the toothpaste lid – these are normal activities in our house. I’m tired of it. Miranda is tired of these things. I love my kids, but it’s definitely time for bed.

Finally, the kids are down and we’ve both kissed them goodnight. Now I can watch……wait, I still gotta call my mom about the phone. Oh, and get those contacts out of my eyes. Well, I’ll watch for 10 minutes and then do those things. As soon as the 10min are up, I get the contacts out and call mom. The whole time I’m talking, Miranda is correcting me. I don’t have the details quite right, but the gist of my message was the same. If she wanted to be so involved, why did she want me to call in the first place? OK – I hand the phone to her and she handles the situation with mom, masterfully. She’s good.

Now I can finally settle and rest….huh? Oh, you want me to come look at the stuff you bought people for Christmas?? I say “OK,” but I must have said it with some sort of sigh or frustration. Miranda is now mad and explains that I’ve taken “all the fun” out of it for her. She’s right, I shouldn’t have responded with a frustrated tone. I hate that I made it “not fun” for her ’cause she really does enjoy shopping and finding deals. She loves when she gets to show off her purchases and is proud of her work. She does a great job and I love that she takes care of it, ’cause it’s so much easier for me. I shouldn’t have acted that way. I’m the husband who is supposed to “die” for his bride. In our marriage, I’m in the Jesus role and am called to love her as Christ loves the church. He died. I sighed…….I sighed. I know, you may say it’s not that big of a deal. You may say, “Steve, you did so many things right. You died to your own stuff lots of times throughout the day.” Maybe, but Christ died completely, and I didn’t. I’m called to love like He does, but I failed tonight.

LORD, please forgive me. Teach me to love like you. Teach me to be fully present with my children and not just listen half-heartedly to Kesleigh’s stories about coloring books or whatever topic she is currently ranting about. Help me to put down my devices and “do” with my kids – and with Miranda. Give me more patience or a higher tolerance for “annoying behaviors.” Show me how to train my kids away from those behaviors. Give me wisdom to recognize the subtle ways I react ’cause Miranda picks up on them all and I truly want to communicate my love for her in all my actions. LORD, make this season special and help us all to encounter You in each experience – with each family, with each other, in travel, in meals, in gift giving, and in all our interactions with each other. AMEN.

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Me too

“Me too.”

I believe these are incredibly powerful words. These words connect us to other people. They build bridges, communicate love and support. These words demonstrate empathy and bring us together. When I think about it, the people I have to most “me too’s” with are the people I am closest to in this world. Our shared experiences, our commonalities, draw us together and hold us together. “Me too’s” are important.

When someone is struggling, the words “me too” help others to see that they are not alone. When we say it, we’re saying that we are with them, that we understand, that we care and can see why they’d feel the way they do. Even if we have never been in their situation, we can almost always try to put on their shoes and say, “Me too. I understand why you’d feel that way.” We may not ever be able to imagine HOW it feels, but we can seek to understand WHY they’d feel that way. Either way, “Me too.” is powerful. Sometimes (I’m thinking about grief in particular) we don’t even need to say “me too.” Our presence alone communicates it.

When someone is celebrating, a “me too” celebrates too. It strengthens our relationship. When I was a youth minister, it became more and more clear that one of the best things I could do for a student was to show up at a game they were playing or a concert where they were performing. Those experiences, “being with” them became “me too’s” between us and helped draw us closer to one another.

Romans 12:15 – “Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.”

My hope is that I can become more aware of the moments I have. I want to say “me too” more often. I also want to live in a way that creates more “me too’s.” Of course I can’t be at everything I’d like, but I plan to be more intentional about “being with” people. My prayer is that you guys can all join me and say, “Yeah, me too.”

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Home and Hurricanes

Home is where my family gathers. We laugh. We play. We cry. Home is where we settle our lives and work through our difficulties. Home calls us away from strife and beckons us into its’ safety. It’s where we find true rest. It’s where we find peace. Home is where we’re fed and filled and find satisfaction. Home is where we are meant to be. I love home.

My house is not my home. As we evacuated our house and our town this week, these things became much more clear to me. I looked in the rearview mirror and watched all of our earthly possessions grow small and smaller, shrinking as we distanced ourselves from the path of the hurricane. It was very surreal. This week, I have struggled between the fear of losing everything and the knowledge that we already have all that we need in Jesus. We have our family and yet, my faith is intermingled with unbelief.

“Lord I believe. Help my unbelief.” – Mark 9:24

When we drove away, I made some decisions. I decided that I was willing to lose everything that we left behind. I “let go” of our house. I now understand, that I was able to make that decision with confidence because I knew that we would always have a home. Jesus is our home and He has promised to never leave us. He is with us even in the midst of the hurricane. Would I miss certain things? Of course. Mostly things with sentimental value…. Items that are “more” than they actually are. However, in the end, even those things fall short of what Jesus Himself can provide.

Read my first paragraph again:

Jesus is where my family gathers. We laugh. We play. We cry. Jesus is where we settle our lives and work through our difficulties. Jesus calls us away from strife and beckons us into His safety. He is where we find true rest. He is where we find peace. Jesus is where we’re fed and filled and find satisfaction. Jesus is where we are meant to be. I love Him. 

 

PS – We have returned from our evacuation and our house has remained dry. Everything has remained the same. However, I have not remained the same. I have been changed. As a community, we have much work to do. I plan to help my neighbors. I’m praying that together we will experience this true “home” as we work side by side. Pray for us.

 

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Crash – Kesleigh’s Tree

While skiing during Spring Break, Kesleigh hit a tree with her head! She was flying down the slope and was out of control, but she was too scared to just lay down and fall. Instead she sped down the slope, crossed another run and ran straight into a tree. As a dad, I watched in horror  and screamed. My heart sunk as her head bounced off the tree. She was wearing a helmet, but I could see her little eyes close as she fell to the ground and then she didn’t move. I imagined the worst. Was she alive? Was she paralyzed? I was there in just a couple seconds, but those seconds were long, difficult, and frightening. She was conscious. She was crying and scared, but she was alive and appeared to be functioning in every way. I was relieved and thanked God as I grabbed her little body and held it close to mine. I just held her for a while. I was grateful for helmets. Hers had a dent about the size of a softball on it.

Someone came by on a snowmobile and asked if we needed Ski Patrol. I declined and said that I thought she was OK. I was right. She was OK physically, but emotionally, she was not OK. She didn’t want to ski again. She was done and I must admit that I understood why. She had experienced something that would have shaken anyone.

Together, with many tears, and at a very slow pace, we worked our way back down to the lift and then back to the house where we were staying. She opted out of skiing the rest of the day. I didn’t blame her.

The next day, she wanted to try again and so we went out with her cousins and everyone. She was a different skier. A slower skier. A more controlled skier. Unfortunately, at her new pace, she couldn’t keep up with the rest of the group. We had to let them go on without us and so she cried. Grandma stayed with me as I watched over Kesleigh. She didn’t enjoy herself that day. She was sad that everyone went on without her, but she was too scared to speed up. She cried that her legs hurt. She whined saying she couldn’t go any further. She laid on the slopes and refused to get up over and over again. I don’t think she smiled the whole time we were on the mountain together. Skiing was not fun for her anymore. As her dad, that broke my heart, but I must admit that I was not having any fun either. I was growing weary and impatient with her whining and complaining. Yes, I knew she came by it honestly, but I also knew her potential, and I didn’t want to let her settle for staying home and not skiing. She had already fallen in love with skiing and I didn’t want to allow her to deprive herself of all the fun she could have simply ’cause she was scared. Fear can do that, but I felt like this was a perfect time for a lesson in perseverance. (It would test my own as well.)

For the rest of the day, we struggled. She didn’t want to stop, but her pace, her whining and complaining and crying made me want to stop. Even grandma grew weary and tired of Kesleigh’s attitude. When we got home at the end of the day, my mom told me that she thought I should win the “Best Son” and “Best Daddy” award for staying back and watching over them on the slopes. I was shocked ’cause I didn’t feel like I had been a good dad at all. I was really feeling impatient and tired. I felt like I had been short with Kesleigh and maybe even pushed her too hard a few times. Mom thought I had been patient, but mom didn’t know the thoughts that I had been fighting all day.

Here’s what I realized. I can be really patient and I don’t mind going slow when there is effort being made. As long as we’re moving forward, I’m OK with slow and methodical. I struggle when there’s complaining and whining and excuses. At those times, I’m not patient at all. I just want to keep moving forward and none of those things helps the process so I grow weary and lose patience.

Here’s my plea: If you need someone to be patient, put forth some effort. Don’t whine, complain, or make excuses. Just keep working toward the goal.

I can be patient when there is effort. I think we all can.

PS – The 3rd day, Kasen chose join us to help his sister and she did much better. By the end of that day, Kesleigh was back to her normal pace, but wiser with controlling her speed. That’s my girl!!! Proud of my boy too for sacrificing some of his ski time to help his little sister.