The deep longings we have to know and be known by true friends, comes from God. We were created for community. Small groups is where we experience Bible Study, Community, and Care. Jesus is the bread of life, but it is His community that serves it to us.
Here’s the text of the message:
It was the Sunday before Thanksgiving in 2010. I had been without a job for almost a year. It had been a hard year and probably the worst of it wasn’t financial but the toll that it took on my own sense of worth. I had been beaten down and struggled every day to recognize that Jesus was all that I really needed. I focused on Him and had some truly incredible moments, but I also had some of my darkest moments during that time. Anyway, that Sunday night we were home doing nothing, I mean, we didn’t have much to do. We had cancelled internet and couldn’t afford anything really. But there was a knock at the door, so I went and answered it. Outside the door was a crowd of people singing Christmas carols, but they weren’t just carolers. They were our friends. Friends from other cities and other states. Friends from next door. Friends from our church, our small group, and from churches we served years before, old students from my youth ministry days. These were not just people. They were “our people.” Miranda and I stood with our kids in our arms and tears in our eyes. As they finished singing, one of them said, “Steve, Miranda, we know you’ve had a difficult year, but wanted you to know that you aren’t alone. We’re here for you. One of them gave Miranda a brown paper bag and then they all took turns greeting us individually sharing their lives and hearts with us as they dropped money and checks into the bag. We got to experience this little community of God’s people “being the church” for us that night. It was humbling, but amazing! Later that night one of my friends reminded me, “Steve, we could have sent you the money. This wasn’t about the money. We knew you needed more than that. We wanted to be with you guys. We wanted you to know we were hurting for you and we may have been miles away, but we have been going through this with you. We’re here for you.” He was right.
Guys, in all honesty, I don’t know where I’d be today if I had continued down the path I was traveling. They were dark times for sure, but we weren’t alone. Even when it felt like it. Jesus saw us, His people. He knew the condition of my heart and heard the desperation in my prayers. He knew my heart ‘cause He created it. We thought we were alone, but “our people,” “Jesus’ people,” a community of Christ followers – They were with us. Praying for us, Lovingly pulling for us, scheming and secretly planning to show up for us. We were never alone because Jesus was working to stir His people on our behalf. He had a plan to use His people, the church.
You see, we were made for community. We like to think that we are independent and strong and that we don’t need anything or anyone. Our culture especially tells men that this is what it is to be a man – to be tough and rugged and strongly independent. Our culture celebrates radical individualism and the self-made person. But our culture is wrong. There’s a dark side to this kind of individualism. It’s called loneliness, and the US Surgeon General called it a “social epidemic.” This radical individualism and device empowered isolation are both contributing to our mental health crisis. There’s really no getting around it. We need each other.
We are created for community. From the core of who we are, we long for it. When God created the world and everything we know, He would create something and then proclaim that it was “good.” Light, good. Land, good. Plants, good, Heavens, good. Animals, good. He proclaims everything good – until He creates man. With Adam, God says for the first time, “It is not good.” It’s not good for man to be alone. That’s when He created Eve. God created us to be in community. I mean, really God Himself is a community. The Tri-une God, 3-in-1. The Father, Son, and Holy Spirit are their own community. And we were created “in His image.” We long for community ‘cause He created us that way.
God’s design for His people to be in community can be traced all throughout the Bible, all the way to Jesus. He spent most of His time with a community Himself, a small group. It’s 12 guys.
Real community is found in Jesus ‘cause He alone can offer the forgiveness that is needed for us to have real connections and offer real grace to real people.
Think about your own life. It’s crazy how much we long for someone to truly “see” us. From the time we were just children, we’d yell from the playground. “Mom! Look at me!” And it has just continued into adulthood. We want to be known, and to be loved just as we are. We want people to love us in spite of our shortcomings. People who will accept us like we are, but also want more for us. People who see our potential and believe in us. People who will lead us to grow and be challenged and improve.
We want all of this, but we’re also deeply afraid of it. We think that if people really know us, there is no way that they’d love us. We think we’ve got to keep certain parts of our lives hidden away and out of sight. However, we’ve got to learn to be bravely vulnerable. The Brazos Pointe core value is: Authentic Living over Maintaining Appearances. I know it can be intimidating because our deepest wounds come from relationships, but we’ve got to remember that so do our greatest joys and deepest healing. They come on the other side of our vulnerability.
So. . . here we are. We’re made for community. We know we need it and we even long for it, but what do we do?
Many seek community in other activities – sports teams, clubs, social media, political organizations. Really anywhere people gather represents some way that people are seeking connections. Unfortunately, these all fall short. None of them can offer the forgiveness that we have in Jesus and that’s the only way we can have true relationships. God has designed us for much more than any of these other activities can offer and He has given us the church, His people, to satisfy that longing.
So what does a community of Christ followers look like?
Turn with me to Acts 2:42-47. (5th book of the NT – just after the Gospels – Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, Acts.) Now to be clear, Randy shared a message on these verses about a year ago as a part of the Acts series we’ve been working through, but it’s just too good not to return to it today. These verses describe how Christ followers interacted with each other in their community just after His ascension – when He left the earth. It also describes what our community should look like. As the Discipleship Minister here, this describes my dream, my vision for small groups where we can all truly experience the church, and learn to be the church for one another. It’s a place that calls us to grow and become, but also to know and be known. Sunday mornings just aren’t as effective at that. If you come to worship every Sunday, but are still disconnected, then you’re missing something. If you think you’re too busy, I’m sorry but you’re wrong. I get it. I’ve been there and I’ve made those mistakes. (I even stood in front of you guys and shared about it a few weeks ago.) But speaking from experience, there is a price to pay. If you’re too busy, then you’d be better off letting go of something else than missing out on what Jesus has for us in community. Small groups create a perfect place to truly experience God’s people and to practice our faith, building spiritual muscles, reflexes, and habits.
Look with me:
Acts 2
42They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. 43Everyone was filled with awe at the many wonders and signs performed by the apostles. 44All the believers were together and had everything in common. 45They sold property and possessions to give to anyone who had need. 46Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, 47praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved.
Now let me point out a few things here.
First of all, notice verse 44. It says, “All the believers were together.” and had everything in common. It doesn’t say they “met” together or that they “came” together. It says they “were” together. I think this is talking about physical proximity, but I think it’s more than that. It describes a “togetherness” that goes beyond location and speaks of their hearts. They were working out their faith together. They were likeminded and found ways to be in agreement – unified by Jesus. They had been apart, but now in Jesus, they have become “together.” I mean, we can be “with” someone and not be “with” them, right?!?! I can be with someone physically, but not with them emotionally or intellectually. Man, I’m not even always “with” Miranda, my wife when we talk about it this way. She loves Gilmore Girls. I’m definitely not “with” her. She doesn’t like Seinfeld so she’s not “with” me either. We don’t share that bond, but we do have a deeper bond in Jesus.
I actually believe this statement about the first Christ followers is one of God’s most amazing miracles! These people were from vastly different walks of life. They had opposing views on lots of issues, but they were still “with” each other. Can you imagine a group of democrats and republicans who are “with” each other? “Jesus over everything.” Right?!?! In Jesus, it is possible. We can find unity. Though we were apart, we can be “with” one another. As a matter of fact, if we are with Christ, abiding in Him, we are already “with” one another. This is community. This kind of “withness” is our goal here at BPF, and our vehicle for getting there is small groups.
Now, Brazos Pointe emphasizes three primary activities in our groups. Bible Study, Community, and Care. We can see all of these in this passage. Let’s consider the 1st of these activities: Bible Study.
Now, Vs 42 says they were “devoted to the apostles’ teaching.” These teachings have become what we know now as the Bible today. In their time together, the Bible was central. It guided their lives. Their “withness” was found as they gathered around God’s Word, and they worked to both understand and obey it together. They didn’t just show up and learn and then walk away feeling proud of what they knew. No! They were dedicated to working it out and to living it out.
James 1:22 says “Do not merely listen to the word and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says.”
If you look closely at the Acts passage, it’s clear that they set up daily habits. It says they “continued” to do these things and it actually uses the word “daily.” They were practicing rhythms intentionally so they could live as they understood Jesus’ call on their lives. They knew that knowledge alone wouldn’t shape and form them, but small, obedient decisions repeated over and over were the key. It would take practice, effort, work, and intentionality. We’ve got to make conscious, calculated, and deliberate decisions about our own spiritual growth and our communities, or we will end up aged infants just big just babies.
The 2nd primary activity in a BPF small group is Community. Vs 42 says they were devoted “to fellowship.” Being together. Enjoying one another. They were committed to each other everywhere they went too. We see them together in public spaces like the temple studying the Bible, but it also says in vs 46, that it continued when they went home. It says they did this every day. Man, these guys couldn’t get enough of each other. And they couldn’t get enough of the Bible either. It was an obsession. Jesus compelled them to one another. Community, life together, “withness” was a habit and a rhythm that was growing in their lives, and the longer they practiced it, the deeper those roots became. Their community preferred the craziness of a crowded life with Jesus’ people over the solitary life of independent living. They made a good choice.
US Surgeon General said that isolation is worse for your health than 15 cigarettes/day.
Christian author, John Ortberg summed up a 7000 person study saying, “Researchers found that the most isolated people were 3 times more likely to die than those with strong relational connections. People who had bad health habits such as smoking, poor eating habits, or obesity or alcohol use, but strong social ties, lived significantly longer than people that had great health habits, but were isolated.”
Andy Stanley piggybacked on this saying, “It is better to eat Twinkies with good friends than to eat broccoli alone.”
In addition to the Bible, history, science, and sociology all point to our need for community and the dangers of isolation. We were made for community.
The last of our 3 primary small group activities is Care. Vs 45 says they sold their possessions to care for “anyone who had need.” I think that means they made sacrifices to care for the annoying people, and the ones who always seemed to need a little extra grace. It means people who are democrats and people who are republicans. It means people who are rich & poor, sick or healthy. It even means people that we don’t like. , . or people who are simply not like us. They took care of everyone.
Galatians 6:2 – “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.”
I love this verse. We can fulfill the law of Christ (that’s love) by helping others. “Fulfill” is a big word. And the “law of Christ” is a monumental task, but in one simple act, we can get ‘er done.
Now, I’ve been in churches for most of my life and when we hear about people going through struggles, we like to say, “I’ll pray for you.” We like saying that ‘cause it makes us feel better and sounds all spiritual, but how often do we actually pray? Sometimes what people really need is someone to come over with a truck and help them move their couch. Prayer is important and good, but a kind word, a shoulder to cry on, your presence at a hospital, a smiling face behind a coffee cup. . . man, sometimes these are the things that make the biggest difference. It’s been almost 15 years, and I’m still talking about people showing up in my front yard. By the way, these are the kinds of things that become simple and come naturally when we have the right kinds of relationships with people – when we have taken the time to truly invest in people and work over time to build a history with them. You’d probably stand in someone’s yard like that if you were close to them. You wouldn’t skip a hospital visit if it was your child in that bed. We fall over ourselves and make all kinds of sacrifices to attend the weddings of people that are close to us. When you have these kinds of relationships, you show up. And they show up for you. It’s just what you do. In a real community you are both one who has needs, and one who fills needs. One who cares and one who is cared for.
All of this is to say that here at BPF, we want you to have real community, and that can only be found among God’s people. We believe that it’s important to:
- Be “with” other Christ followers
- Be Devoted to Bible Study
- Practice intentional habits for growth
- Be committed to Christ following Community
- Care for Others
Small groups are a place where God can work His greatest miracles through Bible Study, community and care. It’s the place where lives are forever changed – where people can know and be known, support and be supported. It’s where God’s people become the family that we were created for.
We aim to create small groups that are interconnected communities of love and depth in a world of hyper-individualism, loneliness, and superficiality. We believe that practicing Christ-following community is stronger than the world and its’ influence. We may not be perfect, but we believe we’ve got some amazing groups who are true examples of the kind of community that Jesus has called us to.
However, we must choose to be a part of it. It won’t happen by accident. It won’t happen simply because you chose it once, sometime in your past either. This is a choice we must intentionally make each and every day.
If you aren’t currently connected, I’d encourage you to find a way to get connected. I know your schedules are crazy, so I’m not asking you to do something more. I’m asking you to do something different. You may have to say NO to other things in order to say YES to Christ-following community. If you’ve been in a group before or are close to someone who is, join that group. If life forced you out for a season, jump back in. Don’t get comfortable in your isolation. If you’re new or don’t have other connections, the “Rooted” experience is the place to start. It’s a discipleship class designed to build connections around the Bible with some experiences to practice what you learn.
My wife, Miranda and I walked into a “Rooted” group at the beginning of this year and wondered if we were going to make any real connections, but just a few weeks in, we knew we had found some new friends. Our group will be a part of the kickoff event next Sunday and will begin meeting as a regular small group the following week. Here’s the thing though. We’re not just meeting. We became friends during “Rooted” and we have had a couple of other gatherings this summer just so we could stay connected. We seek each other out on Sundays and share what some might consider an annoying (but fun) text feed, but we love it. Our group is looking forward to being together again. It’s not just a meeting. It’s a gathering of friends. This is our hope and our prayer for you as well. Get in a “Rooted” group if you don’t have a small group. Talk to myself or Erin Wilson at the Next Step center in the foyer. You can also sign up for a Rooted class using the QR code on the seatback in front of you.
One last thing: I really want to be clear. I am not asking you to get involved in a group because we need more people in groups. I’m urging you cause I know that God created us for community, and I have found it. I know how much of a difference it has made in my life. I’m not special either. I honestly don’t know anyone in real community who isn’t grateful for it. I’m just “one beggar telling another beggar where to find bread.” Like bread, community fills, and satisfies, sustains us, and gives us life. Now to be clear, Jesus is the bread, but it is community, God’s people, who serve it to us. (by the way, if you think you have community somewhere outside of Jesus, it’s not bread that they are serving you.)
We need people who will stand in our yard and we need to stand in the yards of others. I’m just grateful for what I’ve experienced and I want you to experience it too. Community is what the church is all about ‘cause we come to know Jesus through His people. We hear echoes of His voice and see demonstrations of His love through His people. Community is where we experience the hands and feet of Jesus.
AMEN